Beaten up
After a hard day's drinking my friend Jase and I ended up in the Rose and Crown (a bit of a shit hole pub in the middle of Stratford on Avon) playing pool with a bunch of his scary 'born again' christian buddies.

Towards closing time I was trying to get a final drink, and the barman seemed to be ignoring me in favour of the (seemingly never ending) procession of gorgeous young ladies who also wanted a last drink before the bar closed. I finally got served by the little scrote, and retreated with my beer to the pool tables.

Finally the inevitable happened, and we were told we had to leave as they were closing up. Still sore from my extended wait at the bar (remember I was VERY drunk) as I walked past the bar I stuck my thumb up at the barman who served me and gave him a big grin, he responded in kind, at which point I shouted in his face "Shit bar staff!".

Ok, not the wittiest comment, but it obviously hit the spot, as the guy volted over the bar and proceeded to pummel me. I stumbled out of the pub and fell against a car whilst he punched and kicked me. I discovered later that he stopped because one of the happy clappers I had been playing pool with (a big girl) had taken off her belt and started beating him across the back with the buckle end of it!

Anyway, a couple of the scary bouncers from the pub informed me that if me or my mate ever showed our faces in there again we would get the shit kicked out of us... I took that to mean we were barred.

A number of days later the fucking police showed up at my house (god knows how they found me) because I had dented some dudes car with my head whilst I was beaing beaten up. It's good to know they are on the ball :-(

Oh.... one last thing - my mate has an identical twin brother who we forgot to mention all this to. He went into the Rose and Crown shortly after it happened and only just managed to escape without a good beating coz they wouldn't believe he wasn't his brother! Oops....
(Captain Happy, Tue 5 Sep 2006, 9:15, Reply)