Blue shampoo.
While I was at university I didn't have the predilection for fine bathing products that I do now. It was mostly whatever Smartprice, Tesco Price and Aldi Nasty Value shit I could get a hold of.

I'd decided to 'smoke' some 'massive drugs' as I'd been told a stoned wank was rather good, ie your brain thought it lasted longer and you ended up a sticky dribbling mess for a number of hours, so why not.

One half-bottle of Smartprice blue shower gel later as a lubricant and I've done the deed and I fall asleep on my bed in a drugged haze for some hours.

I woke up with my skin tingling a little - there was an ultramarine slime all over the sink, carpet, bed, my torso, hand and crotch, and it felt a bit like sunburn. One shower later and it still burnt. My hand was red raw and it hurt to walk.

A couple of days later my skin is peeling like nasty sunburn, my cock is on fire, my skin is still blue, much like getting orange fingers from the sticky ribs in a chinese takeaway.

I finally went to my doctor and admitted I'd had a shower with it and must have 'scrubbed a bit hard', he laughed and gave me a week of E45 cream and sudocrem.

I learnt my lesson by not wanking stoned with the cheapest blue shower gel I could find. Take care, kids.
( moohalaa, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 11:32, 1 reply)

Wanking with any kind of shower gel or personal wash product is a bad idea.
The detergent in most of them (sodium lauryl or laureth sulphate) is a known irritant, and is not generally used in products meant for sensitive skin.

To be honest, you got off lightly; cheap stuff tends to have a lot less SLS or SLES in it than premium products. Though some of the branders are really cutting their own throats in terms of product performance these days.
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 22:24, closed)