On your own fire
Tonight I'm going camping. And taking a shitload of beer, meat, and spices.

I'll build a fire from scratch, pull a couple of large flat, smooth stones out of the river, sit them next to the fire until the flames subside and leave the roasting embers.

Then I'm going butter up a whole chicken (about £3 out of Tesco), cover it in garlic and assorted spices, then ram a half-drunk can of beer up it and stand it on one of the stones by the fire. The beer steams the chicken from the inside while the fire crispens up the skin.

On the other stone I'm going to splash a bit of beer for lubrication, then lay a steak on it with a wee bit of Cajun seasoning. The heated stone will cook it in no time, while the beer and Cajun flavouring is the absolute moneyshot.

As always, it'll be the best steak, and the juiciest chicken I've ever eaten.

The satisfaction of having built your own fire and cooked such fine cuisine on it is immense. And the flavour is second to none.

Having just read all that back to myself, I know what you're thinking. And yes, I have just made myself very hungry, and slightly aroused.

EDIT: I'll post some pix of the food on Monday, and I promise my genitals will not feature in any photographs
(Barry Subchimp, Fri 27 May 2011, 11:18, 14 replies)

I'm thinking
that you'd better take your Camping Gaz stove with you, or you might well be shitting through the eye of a needle in the morning.
(Rsoles, Fri 27 May 2011, 11:24, closed)

That doesn't make any sense.

(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Fri 27 May 2011, 11:28, closed)

Try
not cooking a chicken properly, then come back and tell me if it makes sense.
(Rsoles, Fri 27 May 2011, 11:39, closed)

But he is going to cook it properly.
That beer can trick's brilliant.
(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Fri 27 May 2011, 11:43, closed)

just make sure you open the can first
Unlike my mate who blew his bbq up.
(Kip, Sun 29 May 2011, 9:17, closed)

Ohhhhhh yes it does!

( Peej, Fri 27 May 2011, 11:39, closed)

Fear not. I've done this a fair few times before. As long as you give the chicken enough time it's fine.
(Barry Subchimp, Fri 27 May 2011, 11:55, closed)

how long does it take?
given that it takes about an hour and a half to roast a chicken in an oven.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 27 May 2011, 12:20, closed)

Fantastic
Nothing better than camp cooking.
And I don't mean cooking whist wearing a tiara and high heels saying Darlings, would like a bit of breast!.
(SpangoTheWonderBadger is brewing beer, Fri 27 May 2011, 12:24, closed)

you do the mince
I'll walk properly
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 27 May 2011, 12:28, closed)

Stolen
I'll use that one on the wife.
(SpangoTheWonderBadger is brewing beer, Fri 27 May 2011, 14:43, closed)

I've seen wet stones explode on a fire
but properly done beercan chicken can be worth digging shrapnel out of your eyelid.
( M3rx likes the Asian ladies, Fri 27 May 2011, 12:39, closed)

This^ Beat me to it.
Dry stones ONLY!! Or your food will be everywhere but where you want it.

And an old biscuit tin with the chicken in, buried under the fire will work wonders;-)

Edit, hope you get the weather for it, we're off on Sunday for a weeks glamping too.
( Blind Meach Cautiously optimistic, Fri 27 May 2011, 13:14, closed)

I put the giant stones next to the fire rather than in the middle. That would be lunacy. Just pile the embers up at the side.

A couple of hours drinking round the fire then the chicken's done.
(Barry Subchimp, Fri 27 May 2011, 13:35, closed)

Three quid for a whole fucking chicken!
What the fuck is wrong with it?
( Wet-chinned bag shanker Cannot parse Wogan, Fri 27 May 2011, 13:35, closed)

what's right with it?!

(Kip, Sun 29 May 2011, 9:16, closed)

It'll be perfectly healthy.
Or at least it should be what with being pumped full of antibiotics.
( SteamedCleaner, Sun 29 May 2011, 10:50, closed)

Are you going to put up the pictures Barry
or have you succumbed to salmonella?
( Pig Bodine., Tue 31 May 2011, 12:52, closed)

I think Bazza
either blew himself up or choked on uncooked chicken
( Snollock Biffer I don't really sniff Bollocks, Tue 31 May 2011, 19:54, closed)