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This is a question Best Comebacks

At some point we've all been insulted. What's the wittiest retort you've ever uttered leaving the antagonist lost for words? Share your wisdom so that we learn, and have a come back ready for every occasion.

(, Thu 29 Apr 2004, 14:19)
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Ah there are many...
I can't take credit for this but I still wee myself laughing whenever I think about it.

We'd just started Art College and like most 18 year olds a lot of us were trying to act older & 'wiser' than we actually were. One guy took the biscuit though, every story someone told he'd done something much more amazing/impressive - this attitude was compounded by him being a truley terrible liar.

One night my friend was talking about how his condom had split whilst shagging his ex and the harrowing day that followed getting the Morning After pill. To which this little shit machine piped up

"Don't even joke about that shit man. When I was 12 I got my 19 year old girlfriend pregnant"

Needless to say we all pissed ourselves at the prospect of him ever having a girlfriend, let alone one of 19 at 12. He stood up and getting angry shouted

"Hey! I had to get her an abortion!"

to which my flatmate quickly replied

"What? Abortion of chips?"

I have never laughed so much in my life.
(, Thu 29 Apr 2004, 21:10, Reply)

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