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This is a question Blood

Like a scene from The Exorcist, I once spewed a stomach-full of blood all over a charming nurse as I came round after a major dental operation. Tell us your tales of red, red horror.

(, Thu 7 Aug 2008, 14:39)
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Military College Blood Drives
As far too many of you know (because I seem to ALWAYS post about my time there or in the Marines) I went to a military college. My screename should be a giveaway...

Anyway, we had frequent blood drives. FREQUENT. And the company that donates the most blood would win themselves an overnight weekend (we didnt get overnights much). So we pressured our Freshmen (also known as Knobs) to donate...as often as they could get away with it.

So, as a Knob (no jokes please) I donated twice. I donated first with my right arm and when I went back, about 3o minutes after the first donation, I returned and advised the nurse who was to take the blood from me that I had "issues with the veins in my right arm" and she said "Okay Hon, whatever you need."

She punctured my left arm. I was chuffed. Two pints! That's GOTTA get me respect in the battalion! So one of the particularly twisted aspects of all this is that between companies (I was a Bravo Company Knob) we competed against one another on the first one to fill the donation bag. Squeezing your fist and flexing, does expedite the bag filling process...

So I am racing one of my classmates, but from another company: Kilo Company in this instance, and I race AND beat him to the finish! I filled my donation bag before he did! OOOH RAH!

Until I went to slide off the table...my knees were definitely wobbly. But I was "okay." I literally stood up like a gymnast who had just stuck their landing after a particularly challenging dismount (without pumping my fists however)...and about 6 steps later, I saw the floor approaching my face at what I considered to be an ALARMING rate.

I woke up with three Nurses (two of which were pretty hot in fact!) and they were inspecting BOTH my arms.

I was busted! They sent me to the infirmary. NOT GOOD.

The next day, I was released and when I returned to my company, I was an 'ing HERO! All because I bled enough to pass out! THAT is the essence of being a military cadet in the American Southeast! (we DID win the overnight by the way)

The Best Bleeder in Bravo Company!

Click "I Like This" if you think I should have been taken out back and shot to see how quickly the rest of my blood would leave my system!


(, Sun 10 Aug 2008, 7:18, 9 replies)
Now why doesn't this story surprise me : )
(, Sun 10 Aug 2008, 9:29, closed)
...being incompetent enough to incapacitate yourself is considered a good thing at a military college?

(, Sun 10 Aug 2008, 10:28, closed)
You muppet!
Gave me a laugh, though, so have a *click*
(, Sun 10 Aug 2008, 11:02, closed)
No: the thing is, in a military college, it's all about surrendering your ego and striving to assist the 'team' in this case, the team was 'Bravo Company'.

I know it probably sounds silly to you, but at the time it seemed like a brilliant idea! lol
(, Sun 10 Aug 2008, 17:03, closed)
US Marines
Hardly a patch on the Royal Marines :)
(, Sun 10 Aug 2008, 20:09, closed)
A patch?
What do you mean by that? Remember, I am thick: I am not only a Yank, I wore the eagle, globe and anchor. :)
(, Sun 10 Aug 2008, 21:52, closed)
You wanker!
I was the third nurse!
(, Sun 10 Aug 2008, 22:48, closed)
The ugly one?!
Sorry. You were not 'ugly' just outclassed by the other two. :)
(, Sun 10 Aug 2008, 23:33, closed)
My life's story...
(, Sun 10 Aug 2008, 23:56, closed)

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