My dad got a bad nosebleed once
and had the genie-arse idea of sticking a tampon up his nose rather than the tried-and-tested bung of bog-roll.

Minutes later we heard "Ooh, ow ... BLOODY HELL! OW!" from the kitchen

Turns out he'd gone for a glass of water, and the blue string had dipped into it whilst he supped. The capilliary action had carried the water up the rip-chord and started to soak - and thereby rapidly expand - the tampon.

How father yelped in pain as the tampon attempted to stretch his poor nostril to goaste proportions. An oh, how we lolled :)
( Droog is too orangey for crows, Tue 12 Aug 2008, 13:03, 6 replies)

just borrowed a tampon to test this...
...and it's bollocks. Not only will a tampon not inflate forcefully enough to cause any sort of pain (do remember where they're designed to be stuffed...) but to get anywhere near enough water up that string you'd have to dip it in there on purpose for ages.

Funny mental image, but myth well and truly busted.
(keyboardman, Tue 12 Aug 2008, 14:18, closed)

well debunked.
good work!
(wrigglesworth, Tue 12 Aug 2008, 15:31, closed)

Haha, undoubted bollocks though this is...
...it made me laugh when I read it, therefore I'm clicking =)
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Tue 12 Aug 2008, 17:57, closed)

:D
Fair cop, my dad did cut the string off the tampon when he shoved it up his nose as he felt to ridiculous with it dangling down his face, I thought it would give the story a bit more and lollability to give the mental image of the water travelling up the string like the fuse on a cartoon bomb. It was actually the bottom of the tampon that dunked in the water, but never let the facts get in the way of a good yarn, as they say.

I love that you actually went and got a tampon and tested this though :D I had no idea the fallibility of qotw answers were tested this thorougly!
( Droog is too orangey for crows, Wed 13 Aug 2008, 9:51, closed)

Well, after the "pointless experiments" QOTW
I have made it my business to test some of the less believable ones out for myself! And having a female housemate with a spare blob-rocket made it fairly easy. With two weeks holiday, not much cash and nothing to do, I have to amuse myself somehow! She never even questioned why I wanted it... she has learned the answers may frighten her.
(keyboardman, Wed 13 Aug 2008, 11:19, closed)

Ha ha :D
What do you mean you have nothing to do, you have all that delightful daytime tv to indulge yourself with! All those ads for loan / compensation companies and episodes of Loose Women won't watch themselves you know!
( Droog is too orangey for crows, Thu 14 Aug 2008, 12:16, closed)