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This is a question Body Horror

Mictoboy writes, "I once picked a spot on my cheek only for a half-inch long ingrown hair to coil out covered in pus."

How has your own body made you recoil in disgust?

(, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 14:02)
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I was terribly bored and was wondering how to create a bit of cheer for myself
so I decided to have a nice mid-afternoon wanking session. This was back in the day when there was no free net porn and one had to make do with your own imagination. I had been edging for about an hour and decided to up the stimulus but with what?

I went to micturate and there next to the taps was the very thing to up the masturbation ante, Macleans Original Fresh Mint toothpaste. Applying the product liberally to my willy I decided to use the lubricant properties to finish the job off quickly and because the mint was causing a bit of heat. I had my eyes closed and I promptly reached orgasm. All was good. In fact, not a bad wank at all.

No, all was not so good. On staring down at my wilting penis and hand they were both covered in blood, white toothpaste turning the mess a lurid pink. It had not occurred to me that the menthol would cause the blood vessels to erupt in this manner but they did. It was quite a shock to see my penis in such a sorry state and I was disgusted.

I say disgusted. . .
(, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 14:32, 8 replies)
I'd say you've likely won this one seeing as there'll only be about four actual stories.

(, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 14:37, closed)
Cheer up, it could have been worse...
(, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 15:03, closed)
I live near calderstones, near Whalley
I say near, about 10 miles. Toothpaste and sand, how marvellous.
(, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 16:09, closed)
Ah, that old lubricant: toothpaste...
...the one that is sufficiently abrasive to remove plaque from teeth in daily use.

Shrewd move, cock.
(, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 16:10, closed)
Yes, I would much prefer to read about Vauxhall Corsas and scroungers.

(, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 16:26, closed)
Then I shall write more stories about them, just for you.
There's no need to thank me.
(, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 16:43, closed)
Close the polls.
Nothing is going to beat toothpaste wankdeath unless Club Chinless Self-loathing start posting self portraits. And not even you cunts deserve that.
(, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 16:22, closed)
Nope sorry dude.
Still curly down there.

There are a couple more grey ones if that means anything.
(, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 20:47, closed)

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