I once had an ingrowing toenail
and the side of my toe was all swollen and red and very tender. After a few days it subsided and the swelling went down slightly, but it looked like a very large saggy blister. That looks really odd I thought. So I sat on the edge of the bath, playing with it and poking it about when it suddenly ruptured and emptied a load of dark green pus everywhere. It looked like someone had cleared their bronchial throat and spat on my toenail.
I was repulsed though amazed, but nowhere near as much as Mrs SLVA was when I called her through to see. She wasn't as impressed as I was and consequently called me a 'minging fucker' before shoving me into the bath.
She wasn't very impressed later either when after cleaning it up, I showed her the remaining pocket of skin on my toe and how I could carry a 5p coin in it.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Thu 18 Jul 2013, 9:03, 2 replies)

A recent study found that coins were one of the most germ-ridden objects you encounter in daily life
Just think of that next time you're thinking of inserting one into any part of your (or someone else's) body...
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Thu 18 Jul 2013, 11:16, closed)

Do you still carry your money there?

(andythepieman Is surfing the waves of indifference on, Thu 18 Jul 2013, 11:48, closed)