Fat nerd
Between the ages of 5 and 8 I had a boyfriend and loads of friends. Maybe it was the grown-up patent shoes that converted into slip-ons in a single swivel of the strap, or my Alacarte Kitchen and post-office-in-a-suitcase... anyway, I was popular. Then one by one, over the course of a year, all but one of my friends left for other schools (and in many cases, other countries).

The bullying soon started, with one illiterate scumbag called Louise pushing me into a nettle filled ditch and punching me in the face.

Then, when I started puberty a couple of years later I grew boobs and put on a lot of weight in a short space of time. I was accused of stuffing my bra, called a variety of fat-themed names and they also made up songs about me. It got worse through high school, as they taunted me for my decent grades (how is 'boffin' an insult exactly?), my accent and my weight.

I developed a very efficient way to deal with name-calling: When they called out "oi fatty", I would turn to them, grin, wave enthusiastically and say "hello!" in a cheery voice. This confuses and angers them at first, but after a while they just give up.

Of the resident gang of bitches, Katherine was the worst. 5 foot 8 of amateur make-up and straightened bleached hair. She was at least 2 sizes bigger than me, but at 10 inches taller it was easier to hide (so she still mocked me for my weight). She slammed my head into a coat-hook and started a rumour that I was a lesbian...

Anyway, I digress.

Years later, size 10 with a great job and happily married, I tracked down many of the bitches through myspace and facebook. For the most part the bitches are now fat, haggard single mothers. The icing on the cake was Katherine's former boyfriend tracking me down to ask me on a date - apologising for being horrible to me at school because he didn't want Katherine to beat him up.

These people blighted my childhood, but at least now I can rejoice in their misery. That's healthy, isn't it? :D
(Supermonkey, Sun 17 May 2009, 16:22, 4 replies)

"Katherine was the worst. 5 foot 8 of amateur make-up and straightened bleached hair."
You are me in another time zone AICMFP. There was a Katherine at my school exactly like her, with the added bonus of being a trained soprano who thought she was the dog's bollocks.
( Maladicta, Sun 17 May 2009, 16:46, closed)

rubs hands together
Why yes... Yes it is healthy.
(TDub Nunc id vides, nunc ne vides on, Sun 17 May 2009, 18:41, closed)

I wanted
those shoes with the swivelly strap, farrrrck, how I wanted them. They had this little flower motif at the ankle as well, didn't they? Cut out, and that.

Your story would be the outcome I would have wished for aged 10 (cept the InterBook wasn't invented yet).

Kids can be such bitches, can't they
(maggotriddendirtbox fast, feral and sharp as a tack since, Mon 18 May 2009, 6:51, closed)

Yup.
Perfectly healthy. There's nothing wrong with a bit of schadenfreude, and I too have had a nice derisive sneer at the white trash most of my classmates have become.

Feels great, doesn't it? :)
(berk, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:32, closed)