Blowjob based lies
I have been friends with a lovely guy, W, since starting at secondary school. He'll do anything for you until someone cooler comes along, at which point he will stab you repeatedly in the back for kicks.
I think you can work out what this guy, aged about 17, spent most of his day thinking about when you look at his lies.
A classic was, while we sat and chatted in a pub, he came back from the toilet having just "got a cheeky blowjob". Having had enough of his lies so pressed for details.
"She was just in one of the cubicles, so I undid my belt and she sucked it."
"If I go to the toilets now will she still be there?"
He starts getting angry. "No, she swallowed and left before me." Knowing from experiance that pressing his lies will ruin a good night we leave it.

This social black-mail meant that we left many of his lies standing. These include:
Getting a blowjob on a ferry from a group of horny convent school girls.
Buying a gun from a man in out town that turned out to be my friends older brother who has never even seen an RL gun.
Having a 4x1 metre roll of LSD Tabs, we shouldn't try them incase we had a bad trip.
He carried £100,000 strapped to his body, to France, for his Dad's company and got a 1% kickback.
While he was training at Raymond Blanc's 4 Seasons (which he did), he regularly got pissed with "Ray" after service and was too good to train there so Ray "hooked him up" with a better job in France for the ski season.
Now he's in France and has hired a car despite not having a driving license, because "the French are well safe".
(Daveth Koresh is jesus, but welsh, Fri 14 Jan 2011, 2:52, Reply)