Bullshit and Bullshitters
We've had questions about lies and liars in the past, but this time we're asking about the sort of fantasist who constantly claims they've got a helicopter in the garden or was "second onto the balcony at the Iranian Embassy siege". Tell us about the cobblers you've been told, or the complete lies you've come out with.
Thanks to dozer for the suggestion
( , Thu 13 Jan 2011, 12:55)
We've had questions about lies and liars in the past, but this time we're asking about the sort of fantasist who constantly claims they've got a helicopter in the garden or was "second onto the balcony at the Iranian Embassy siege". Tell us about the cobblers you've been told, or the complete lies you've come out with.
Thanks to dozer for the suggestion
( , Thu 13 Jan 2011, 12:55)
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My workmate Ian.
I'd forgotten about this:
In what seems like a past life, I worked in a spare-parts warehouse for a large electrical retailer*. One day a temp by the name of Ian joined us. As one of the "Inventory Team", tasked with ensurimg things were where the computer system said they were and checking the Pickers and Packers were picking and packing the correct parts, I was asked to show him the ropes and get him started picking.
Now, I should mention that I was privately educated until I was 15 and I have A-Levels in a couple of sciences -- this was fairly rare in warehouse work but Ian was an educated guy too and also spoke a little posh, as I did. So, I introduce him to the lads I hung out with and we all got on well -- plenty of 4 pint pool-playing lunchtime and other fun stuff.
Anyhow, Ian's other half was namd Alex and, apparently, she worked at the hospital and had ginger hair -- a fact that was backed up when her brother gave a few of us a lift into town.
Time went on and, one day, Ian announced that Alex was pegnant. There followed the usual months of him getting excited over nursery decoration and worrying about the upcoming sleepless nights.
So, time came for Alex to give birth and Ian was there with her, taking his paternity leave to see the first weeks of his son's life.
On the second week of this my boss David** sidled up to us and asked "Have any of you guys met Alex?" to which we replied in the negative. "I think you might have." was his reply.
I turned out that Ian was gay, and his partner was called Alex and was ginger and it was the guy who gave us a lift to town.
I can kind of understand someone not coming out in that kind of job -- but the fact he was lying to friends (we talked a great deal) and trying to defraud the company was a blow to us all.
*some of the best days of my life, apart from the wages
**only name I disguised to protect the innocent
(sorry, spelling and formatting are broken because I'm using my phone for this)
( , Fri 14 Jan 2011, 18:25, Reply)
I'd forgotten about this:
In what seems like a past life, I worked in a spare-parts warehouse for a large electrical retailer*. One day a temp by the name of Ian joined us. As one of the "Inventory Team", tasked with ensurimg things were where the computer system said they were and checking the Pickers and Packers were picking and packing the correct parts, I was asked to show him the ropes and get him started picking.
Now, I should mention that I was privately educated until I was 15 and I have A-Levels in a couple of sciences -- this was fairly rare in warehouse work but Ian was an educated guy too and also spoke a little posh, as I did. So, I introduce him to the lads I hung out with and we all got on well -- plenty of 4 pint pool-playing lunchtime and other fun stuff.
Anyhow, Ian's other half was namd Alex and, apparently, she worked at the hospital and had ginger hair -- a fact that was backed up when her brother gave a few of us a lift into town.
Time went on and, one day, Ian announced that Alex was pegnant. There followed the usual months of him getting excited over nursery decoration and worrying about the upcoming sleepless nights.
So, time came for Alex to give birth and Ian was there with her, taking his paternity leave to see the first weeks of his son's life.
On the second week of this my boss David** sidled up to us and asked "Have any of you guys met Alex?" to which we replied in the negative. "I think you might have." was his reply.
I turned out that Ian was gay, and his partner was called Alex and was ginger and it was the guy who gave us a lift to town.
I can kind of understand someone not coming out in that kind of job -- but the fact he was lying to friends (we talked a great deal) and trying to defraud the company was a blow to us all.
*some of the best days of my life, apart from the wages
**only name I disguised to protect the innocent
(sorry, spelling and formatting are broken because I'm using my phone for this)
( , Fri 14 Jan 2011, 18:25, Reply)
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