My mate Dave
once went up to a girl in the student union bar who was hardly what you'd call big boned, but she was a bit excessively curvaceous, and then he delivered the most charming and sincere chatup line I've ever heard.

"Do you fancy a shag or are you one of them fanny noshers?"

However, she didn't see the sincerity nor was particularly charmed and declined his invitation with a firm kick to his shins. He came back over to where I was sitting, well hobbled really, and said "It seems she was". I told him that the Doc Martin boots should've given it away if he'd only paid more attention before wading in.
However, it turns out we were both wrong as at the end of the night we saw her down an alleyway sucking off a taller more emaciated version of "Student Grant" from Viz.

Still, you can't judge a butch by it's stereotype I always say.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Fri 11 Dec 2009, 9:54, 2 replies)

Heheheh, nice.
Is it just me, or does everyone have a mate called Dave who is inclined toward this sort of caper?
(ConanTroutman thought we would free the vulture, Fri 11 Dec 2009, 11:18, closed)

Especially Ali G
Half his stories start with "Me mate Dave...".
( .Yeti., Fri 11 Dec 2009, 11:38, closed)