Fun with urinals…

So you’re at work and have sneaked off to enjoy a crafty yet exquisite piss…when you glance downwards and notice that (due to your height / overzealous bladder force / inadequate urinal design), you have spent the last 30 seconds systematically spraying an unstoppable stream of wee wee all down the crotch of your suit trousers…

So you instinctively lean forward to ‘assess the damage’, and proceed to dip your tie into said urinal and then promptly piss all over it…

Then, the resultant (and equally instinctive) neck-jerk recoil leads to you slipping backwards and falling arse-over-tit onto the cold hard tiles below…whacking your foot on the fiendish slash-bin and flapping the (now piss soaked) tie all over your shirt…and face.

…& when you’re lying there, rolling about and swearing like the utter damp tramp you are, in the ever-growing effluent puddle containing the dripped contributions from the rigorous cock-shakes of over a thousand different colleagues…your boss walks in…and tells you that you have a meeting in five minutes…

Now...is that common?

...?

…cos…erm….it’s never happened to me…

Nosirreebob.


...



By the way…on a completely unrelated topic…Does anybody have a towel / hair dryer / new suit I could borrow?

fucksocks

( Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Mon 20 Oct 2008, 12:59, 6 replies)

Cheers Pooflake..
I needed a chuckle, and I think, yes.. I just did a little wee, right there!

This QOTW is an awful awful can 'o worms is it not?
(AndyC4m Eject Eject [><], Mon 20 Oct 2008, 13:07, closed)

I think this is accurate.
No matter how much I shake it, even if I fluff it for about a minute, anxiously glancing at the bathroom door, I always get a wet patch.

Can't they make a special one-way, non-drip, willy valve sock or something?
(powervator and NONE SHALL PASS, Mon 20 Oct 2008, 13:14, closed)

The problem is
that the valve is some way from the nozzle. It's like turning off your garden hose at the tap, although on a smaller scale (unless you have a 30m cock). Water still drips out the end.

Perhaps there's a market for Tena Gentleman?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 20 Oct 2008, 13:38, closed)

Just a thought...
use toilet paper you mucky pups!!!!!
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Mon 20 Oct 2008, 13:19, closed)

I have
never laughed so much in my lunch break - Have a *click*
(Something funny, Mon 20 Oct 2008, 13:20, closed)

Have a *click*
For the first post that's actually made me laugh all week.
( MatJ LOOK, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 0:23, closed)