Halifax Bank is an abhorrent institution
They changed their overdraft charges so we'd end up paying double per month. I told them that we didn't agree to the changes but they carried on charging us anyway. Luckily we jumped ship and went elsewhere and now we get regular reminders that they think we owe them more cash than we actually do plus occasionally one printed in red. Here's my reply to the most recent:
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Thank you for I received your letter dated 6th September 2010, pushed through my door by a surprisingly cheerful postman. You commence your letter with:

Pay £xxx now

Followed by an invitation to help you earn yet more of my cash by calling your 0845 number. I make a point of not calling 0845 numbers. It inevitably works out cheaper to write letters given how long I often end up on hold.

As you removed the overdraft facility as detailed in a letter dated 30th April 2010, our 'arranged overdraft' is technically £0.00. This being the case, your statement that we are over our arranged overdraft limit by £xxx suits me fine. This is quite pleasing as I thought we owed just short of £LOTS, not allowing for the thoroughly bizarre charging regime you are attempting to force upon us. You know, the one that we didn't agree to in five (5) separate letters. I'll say it again; "we don't agree to your new charging regime, and never did"

and here it is again in red.

"We don't agree to your new charging regime, and never did"

Short of hiring a small plane and sky-writing it in red smoke accompanied by a small orchestra and fireworks I cannot think of any other way to get you to take notice. I'll make the offer to repay it again. You calculate how much is owed using the old interest rates that we agreed to and we'll pay £10 per week plus more if we can spare it. I'll enclose a cheque to sweeten the deal. You can't say fairer than that.

Yours
SLVA
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Wed 8 Sep 2010, 13:28, 11 replies)

0845 number are now free... sorry

(JellyBelly JellyBelly, Wed 8 Sep 2010, 13:34, closed)

Ah, but
personal time is more important than work time. Put a value on that.
( Blind Meach Cautiously optimistic, Wed 8 Sep 2010, 13:44, closed)

and depending on circumstances
you may have to record the call and I don't have the kit for that. Besides I can put more thought into a letter as I'm not that eloquent when on the phone.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Wed 8 Sep 2010, 13:48, closed)

Not on my phone bill they aren't

( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Wed 8 Sep 2010, 13:47, closed)

Oh no they're not

(Vice Admiral Sir Charles Cockbrush KCB MBE DSO, who is finding it increasingly difficult to log into b3ta.com wants to duck your aunt and kick your puppy, Wed 8 Sep 2010, 14:00, closed)

Oh yes they are!
www.guardian.co.uk/money/2009/jan/08/bt-customers-premium-rate-phonecalls
(JellyBelly JellyBelly, Wed 8 Sep 2010, 14:18, closed)

No, they're really not
Why do you assume SLVA's a BT customer?
(DigitalRaven will have to make do with gin, Wed 8 Sep 2010, 14:29, closed)

aaahhhh crap - serves me right for being smart arse. I bow to your wiserer wisdom.

(JellyBelly JellyBelly, Wed 8 Sep 2010, 14:32, closed)

halifax are cunts
i have an aunt who used to work for them. when my mum tried to open accounts there for me and my sister, my aunt told her go to barclays instead
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 8 Sep 2010, 17:37, closed)

cunts
the sort that would get a necrophiliac all moist.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Wed 8 Sep 2010, 19:26, closed)

Barclays are as bad.

I didn't have a days trouble with Woolwich... but problems with Barclays from the day they took over my account till the day I left some three years later (and went to co-op bank, with whom I have had no trouble at all - and who actually have helpful staff)
(Freakmandu, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 5:05, closed)