Hotel SplendidoEnzyme writes, "what about awful hotels, B&Bs, or friends' houses where you've had no choice but to stay the night?"
What, the place in Oxford that had the mattresses encased in plastic (crinkly noises all night), the place in Blackpool where the night manager would drum to the music on his ipod on the corridor walls as he did his rounds, or the place in Lancaster where the two single beds(!) collapsed through metal fatigue?
Add your crappy hotel experiences to our list.
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chthonic, Thu 17 Jan 2008, 16:05)
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Shanghai Pro'sLast year I spent the weekend in shanghai as i was working down the road in hangzhou. We booked in quite a respectful hotel right in the city centre.
On the last day we were all terribly hungover so my mate came up with the good idea of a massage... to which all the girls moaned and groaned - they knew china... they knew the dirtier side. Being the lovely and very modern hotel, I believed this wasn’t going to be the case. I made sure everyone knew my intentions were for a professional massage in the purist sense.
So we get led to the massage and aroma therapy suite in this hotel. I get given my own room, which had a lovely and very modern lazy boy chair, widescreen TV with F1 grandprix on, and a massage bed.
I am left to my own devices for about 10 minutes to relax. Then a young lady in a maid suit enters sits opposite me and says 'sessen handred'
hmm.. i think , what did she mean or want from me? she says it again before leaning over and writing it on a notepad... 700 RMB!! she was a pro!!... my friends were right. To which I politely say no.... she lowers the price to 600.. agian i decline. The only thing was stopping me was my conscience - my girly friends waiting in the bar would have known id had sex and would’ve ejected me from the group.
She stands up with a confused look on her face and walks out... I then hear some hushed talking in Chinese from behind the door... it stops, then a young man enters - in his best polite whispered English he says ' just massage? no sexy?' he says it in a manner of hushed surprise.
I nod and he leaves... the notion of 'does not compute' all over his face.
another 10 minutes pass and another - rougher looking lady walks in and tells me to get on the bed.
... this is where i get a little confused... so that i don’t confuse the staff on my intentions - i decide to leave my clothes on. This wasn’t the greatest of ideas. Having a full body massage with Jeans and a jumper isn’t really much fun... especially when they get to your arse cheeks and your wallet gets in the way.
Anyway.. i get back to the bar all my male friends are still getting 'massages' and after another 30 mintues it becomes obvious they were getting the extras i opted out on... all they got were some odd looks from the girls...
i should take more risks in life...
sorry about the length.
(, Fri 18 Jan 2008, 12:53, 1 reply)
oh wellI respect you in the morning. Don't know that that helps, though.
(, Mon 21 Jan 2008, 8:56, closed)
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