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This is a question Hotel Splendido

Enzyme writes, "what about awful hotels, B&Bs, or friends' houses where you've had no choice but to stay the night?"

What, the place in Oxford that had the mattresses encased in plastic (crinkly noises all night), the place in Blackpool where the night manager would drum to the music on his ipod on the corridor walls as he did his rounds, or the place in Lancaster where the two single beds(!) collapsed through metal fatigue?

Add your crappy hotel experiences to our list.

(, Thu 17 Jan 2008, 16:05)
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Conference in an Indian City Hotel
Around 10 years ago I was stationed in Hyderabad, India whilst I did interesting (yawn) things with agriculture. I was based at ICRISAT, a research station. At the time my colleagues and I would poke fun at the mis-haps that would frequently happen. Little was I to know that ICRISAT was the pinnacle of efficiency compared to the rest of India.
About ten of us were due to attend a conference in Bangalore. I arrived first and checked in. Next to me was an American lady was was also attending the conference, patiently waiting. Not sure how it happened but the the receptionist just presumed that the lady next to me was my wife. Thus about 20 minutes later as I step out of the shower she walks into my room and screams (somewhat theatrically I've always thought).
But my favourite bit of this tale comes from my boss, his name was Andy Whitman. He arrived later than the rest of us. When he tried to book in (he had made a reservation) he was told there was no vacancies due to the conference. Fifteen minutes of sighing and eye-rolling later.
"We are full to bursting sir" said the desk jockey "the only room left is reserved for a Mr Andy". It's quite common to juxtapose surnames and first names in India.
So my boss shouts "AHA! Thats mine, I'm A. Whitman, I'm A. Whitman"
The receptionist says (and I always smile when I relate this bit) "You may be a whiteman sir but you still cannot have Mr Andy's Room"

(, Mon 21 Jan 2008, 15:32, 5 replies)
I like it
(, Mon 21 Jan 2008, 15:37, closed)
That is brilliant.
Sounds like a Bernard Manning punchline but if that's true I love it. Sadly reading the last line I cannot help but hear it in my head in a 'comedy' 70s sitcom Indian accent with accompanying David Gray-esque head wobble.

I've tried three times now.

(, Mon 21 Jan 2008, 15:39, closed)
^What he said^
(, Mon 21 Jan 2008, 15:52, closed)
Just a point...

That ICRISAT is an anagram of I RACIST


*gets coat*
(, Mon 21 Jan 2008, 17:02, closed)
It's a bit like
I, Robot

But without Will Smith.
(, Tue 22 Jan 2008, 11:43, closed)

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