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This is a question The Dark

17,000 writes: Everything bad happens in the dark. Tell us your stories of noises and bumps in the night, power cuts, blindfolds and cinema fumbling.

(, Thu 23 Jul 2009, 15:49)
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Children of the Sun
I don’t mind the dark. Ever since I was a kid I had no problem wandering around the house at night wearing my jim jams with teddy in tow.

So with this in mind, coupled with the fact that I don’t sleep very well and never have, often meant that I walked around the house at night, watched telly very low, read books, drank milk etc. My parents knew I did this but obviously couldn’t really do anything about it if they were asleep and as long as I were quiet they didn’t mind.

One Sunday evening, I couldn’t really sleep. I went downstairs with Teddy, and got some milk from the kitchen. Being a clumsy little twad, I spilt some milk onto the floor. Quite a lot actually.

So I got a mop and started mopping away, singing under my breath, as you do. “Enfant du soleil, tu parcours la terre le ciel, cherche ton chemin, c'est ta vie, c'est ton destin, et le jour, la nuit, avec tes deux meilleurs amis, a bord du Grand Condor, tu recherches les Cites d'Or”. (Having lived in France, I only knew the French lyrics to the Cities of Gold and I typed that from memory so it’s probably wrong)

I then saw a large shape loom out of the darkness and I screamed and tried to use the mop on it.

From my somewhat nervous dad’s perspective, he had awoken to a low swishing noise, and someone whispering. Terror struck him, but he faced his fear and went to the kitchen. It wasn’t too far as we lived in a bungalow and the sound had carried rather too well.

He saw a small hunched figure wielding some sort of ‘axe or hammer’ and muttering about children of the sun. He thought, perhaps irrationally, that this was an escaped mental patient who had broken in, instead of his naughty insomniac son. He moved closer to apprehend this peril but the escaped mental patient shouted ‘kill you!’ at him (that’s what he thinks I said, and still maintains to this day) and lunged directly at his eyes with the hammer. He recoiled backwards in bowel clamping terror and muttered about Jesus preserving him.

I just turned on the light and continued mopping. Dads eh? Tchoh.
(, Thu 23 Jul 2009, 21:15, 9 replies)
That's a great story! *click*
(, Thu 23 Jul 2009, 21:22, closed)
it's been quite a long time
since i've laughed so hard at a qotw *click*
(, Thu 23 Jul 2009, 22:54, closed)
and giggles!
(, Thu 23 Jul 2009, 23:07, closed)
And now
I'll have those lyrics in my head all night.
(, Fri 24 Jul 2009, 0:09, closed)
bloody hell!
haven't thought about that show for 20 years!
(, Fri 24 Jul 2009, 0:19, closed)
Have clickies
For Cities of Gold... Best. Theme Tune. Evah.
(, Fri 24 Jul 2009, 9:15, closed)
The citeees of gollllllllld....
(, Fri 24 Jul 2009, 9:40, closed)
Ahh good link! I just watched it again!
(, Fri 24 Jul 2009, 14:07, closed)
have a click in exchange for the belly laughs.
(, Fri 24 Jul 2009, 19:19, closed)

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