Desperate TimesStranded in a hotel in an African war zone with no internet access for two weeks, I was forced to resort to desperate measures. Possessing only my passport and the clothes I stood up in; and the warning "You can catch it shaking hands with a vicar out there" ringing in my ears, I had to draw my own porn in order to preserve my sanity.
Alas, it all came out looking like Coronation Street's Audrey Roberts, but, as they say, any port in a storm.
What have you done in times of great desperation?
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 15 Nov 2007, 10:10)
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During a particularly dry time in my sexual historyI was forced to accept the offer of a blowjob from a woman who had a face like Tommy Cooper's pulled inside out.
Of the teeth that were still inside her mouth, several were crooked and brown, but I was won over by her boss eyed look.
During the act, I closed my eyes and imagined Kate Moss, Tess Daly, or even Lisa Riley was down there noshing me. On opening my eyes I would see this gargoyle and my ardour would be dampened risking the deflation of my hardness.
After a while, I made the best of it, and started playing a game with it..
Eyes Shut, supermodel expertly fellating me.
Eyes Open, Marty Feldman's daughter.
I called it "Blowjob Minefield".
(, Fri 16 Nov 2007, 11:02, 3 replies)
"Marty Feldman's daughter"Shudder.
(, Fri 16 Nov 2007, 11:14, closed)
Forced?Unless she had a gun, or a knife (which you don't seem to have mentioned), it would appear that you accepted this offer quite willingly.
Still - wouldn't want to have been in your position
(, Fri 16 Nov 2007, 14:40, closed)
Why did you bother imagining Kate Moss?Your initial description sounds a lot like her anyway...
(, Sat 17 Nov 2007, 17:40, closed)
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