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This is a question Desperate Times

Stranded in a hotel in an African war zone with no internet access for two weeks, I was forced to resort to desperate measures. Possessing only my passport and the clothes I stood up in; and the warning "You can catch it shaking hands with a vicar out there" ringing in my ears, I had to draw my own porn in order to preserve my sanity.

Alas, it all came out looking like Coronation Street's Audrey Roberts, but, as they say, any port in a storm.

What have you done in times of great desperation?

(, Thu 15 Nov 2007, 10:10)
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Desperate for a shite
Just remembered this one,

My brother (have mentioned him before as he's a bit of a skanky git) was on the bus into Manchester. Mid-morning, lots of people around. He finds himself in dire need of a shit, so gets off and tried to find a bog unsuccessfully. Ends up squatting on the platform at Gorton station to relieve his predicament and wipes his arse on his copy of the Sun (so it can be put to good use at times) and continues along his merry way catching the next bus into town.

To a job interview.

As a chef.

Where he was asked to do an hour in the kitchen as a trial.
(, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 12:42, 2 replies)
We can only pray
he washed his hands before starting to cook
(, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 13:54, closed)
Gorton station...
... is my nearest station. I'm going to stick to cycling or driving into the office from now on.
(, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 15:44, closed)

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