Dre-e-e-e-m, dream dream dream...
Here's another puberty based disappointment. I'd read the books, knew what to expect: wet dreams. "Don't worry, it's perfectly normal and nothing to be ashamed of." OK, thought I, I'm ready.

I began wanking and found it so enjoyable that I practised like a chimp. I had horny dreams occasionally, woke with a raging boner and dealt with it, but no wet dreams. I began to worry: am I normal? So I laid off the bishop bashing for a couple of weeks - no luck. 'I know,' I thought, 'I'll go to the vinegar strokes just before going to sleep, that'll do it.'

Several nights on the trot I'd slowly stroke myself to the brink, pull back, cool down, then again and again, then sleep.

Nothing! Had to give up in the end when I couldn't get my underpants on one morning.

I have NEVER had a wet dream in my entire life. Is it just me? This is something I've never felt happy discussing with anyone, but I guess you lot can take it.

I guess I'm too old now.
(Che Grimsdale Best before:, Fri 27 Jun 2008, 12:00, 14 replies)

its just you
sorry, it is
( zulu eh?, Fri 27 Jun 2008, 12:28, closed)

Nope
I've never had one either. Dirty dreams, sure. Wet ones? Nup.
( Kroney, Fri 27 Jun 2008, 12:30, closed)

had a few
but not for a while

you should count yourself lucky. they are kind of embarassing in certain situations, and sometimes as you wake up during it it almost feels like you are about to piss yourself.

fortunately I've never done that! (not since I was very young anyway)
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 27 Jun 2008, 12:37, closed)

Blimey.
Probably shouldn't mention that I get them now and again. What's that all about? I'm a girl! The universe is obviously wrong somewhere.
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 27 Jun 2008, 12:41, closed)

You're not the only one
i've never had one either, not once
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Fri 27 Jun 2008, 13:02, closed)

I bet your mum was pleased.
Saved on the washing.
( girlinthehole, Fri 27 Jun 2008, 13:13, closed)

i have had several...
though always found rather than it just playfully ejecting randomly, it is usually caused by the sleepy frotting against ones bedsheets, childhood botty blissfully jackhammering away in the moonlight.
(wrigglesworth, Fri 27 Jun 2008, 13:25, closed)

me neither
i thought i probably should have done.

still, on three square meals of wanking per day i would be surprised if "the gift that keeps on giving" would have had the volume of little fella's left to have made a real impact on the spunk riddled sheets.
( bazza van der trance , ooh baby baby, baby baby. Get up on this., Fri 27 Jun 2008, 13:48, closed)

Same
Never had one
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 27 Jun 2008, 14:34, closed)

Not here
Never.
(Richy_T hundreds if not thousands of dollars, Fri 27 Jun 2008, 19:17, closed)

I had a couple...
Strangely enough they were before I came during masturbation.
And after I'd started to produce manually i never had one again.
(paof2 Nude might not be rude, but rude could be nude..., Fri 27 Jun 2008, 19:48, closed)

Had plenty of 'morning wood'
But I've never had a wet dream either...

I thought it was an urban myth when I was a teenager
(Pavlov's Frog figures no-one really reads sigs anyway, Sat 28 Jun 2008, 1:30, closed)

No. Nay. Never.
Ever.
Reassuring to hear I'm not as odd as I thought.
(SalRossi Laughter the best medicine? Nurse, penicillin....., Sat 28 Jun 2008, 13:59, closed)