More diving tales
It's October 2001, and I'm in Thailand with the ex. Phuket, to be precise, part of a 3 week tour of the far east.

Having booked a day's scuba diving, an early-ish night is on the cards, as the dive company are picking me up at 7am. So we decide to have a romantic meal at the hotel and retire early.

"Ooh, that sounds nice, I'll have that" says I, and orders what sounded like heaven. Baked sea-bass, done with ginger, lime and garlic.

And, it transpired, chili, which wasn't mentioned on the menu. It was so fucking hot it stripped the skin from my lips. Hmm. Scuba diving in sea water, with no skin on my lips. A little like a sub-aqua Mason Verger, if you like.

That wasn't the worst of my problems though. As is sometimes the case when I have spicy food (which I do love), the next morning my stomach was doubled up with cramps and the first thing I have to do is go and lose a bit of weight. Fine and dandy, I thought.

Oh no. This continued on the dive boat, with its primitive toilet facilities - a very basic toilet with a pump action flush mechanism. Trying to get rid of what seemed like several tons of barely-reconstituted sea bass was no easy task, but somehow I managed.

And then came the dive. So there I am, with salt water stinging my lips in the Andaman Sea, with 20 metres of water above me compressing my insides to buggery, and still with what felt like a whole fucking fish working it's way remorslesley through my intestinal tract. Having a piss in a wetsuit is one thing, this was an entirely different ball game...

I don't eat spicy food before a dive now. Lesson learned.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 20 Dec 2007, 19:55, 6 replies)

It was Thailand.
You must have expected the chili surely.

Oddly enough the dish you're talking about was something the second girl from the story below and I ate on a regular basis.

Your story just made me a little bit sadder.
( The Awful Puppy Bakery is still bored, Thu 20 Dec 2007, 20:05, closed)

I probably should have
But I was deliberatley avoiding the dishes on the menu that specifically mentioned chili.

Like I said, lesson learned. And apologies for making you sad.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 20 Dec 2007, 20:10, closed)

No worries.
For future reference, pad thai and jok are the only two thai dishes without chili, and jok is shit, so go for the pad thai.
( The Awful Puppy Bakery is still bored, Thu 20 Dec 2007, 20:14, closed)

Edenmonster
My step mum is Thai. So I get the skin stripped from my lips on a fairly regular basis.

Lesson not learned, perhaps.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 20 Dec 2007, 20:19, closed)

You lucky bugger.
I moved back to England from Bangkok in May after a 5 year stint out there.

What I want more than anything is some decent Thai food, the stuff over here is shit.

Hmmmmmm laap pla dup, somtam poo palaa my mind can taste them now.
( The Awful Puppy Bakery is still bored, Thu 20 Dec 2007, 20:25, closed)

Pffft
Sometime Poo Parlour!
(clumsyeloquence is a girl, Fri 21 Dec 2007, 3:12, closed)