Spiralling out of control
I think I've posted this story before - but this topic is perfect for it.

When I was at Uni, I lived in halls for the first year. There were 10 guys, all living in close proximity on the ground floor. We all got along really well, which was nice, but then the rivalry started. Not with me, but between two guys who shall remain nameless.

I forget what started the pranking, but neither of them were to be outdone, so the whole thing rapidly spiralled into more and more horrendous acts being performed.

I believe one of the first things was 'T', pissing in a cup and leaving it under the bed (and next to the radiator) in 'O's room. Surprisingly enough, a few days later, his room stank of rancid piss, an it was starting to leak into the hallway, so we all broke our vow of silence and got him to do something about it.

O responded by waiting until the day before reading week, and smearing a jar of fish paste on the back of T's radiator.

By the time we got back - the entire hall smelt like a crack whore's gusset, and T couldn't even walk into his room without being sick.

Anyway - this tye of thing continued for quite some time, with some pranks being funnier than others.

The final round, which was never truly finished for reasons which will soon become apparent, stooped to levels bordering on the illegal.

They were both genetics students, and therefore had access to fruit fly eggs, as apparently fruit flies reproduce very quickly, so it's easy to test on them or something. Cue T stealing a handful of said eggs from the lab and wandering home with plans of mischief.

His plan was to drop the eggs into O's box of cornflakes that afternoon. O didn't touch his cereal until the next morning which is about as long as fruit fly eggs need to hatch.

Now I'm a very heavy sleeper - especially so in my uni days, when 3pm wake up times were the norm.

However - I heard the screams. And the shouts.

I threw some clothes on and ran out to the source of the noise.

Upon entering the kitchen, I inhaled a good handful of flies. The noise was something that will still haunt me to this day, and the air was thick with buzzing insects.

We all ran out, trying in vain to contain the infestation in just the kitchen.

By the end of the day, we were all loitering on the grass outside whilst a full team of fumigators went in to clear up the 'problem'.

So that was a pretty good invitation for O to get his own back.

Inspired by the 'stealing stuff from the labs' idea, he concocted a plan so evil, yet hilarious, he had everyone on his side.

There is a chemical that they use in their experiments called phenyl phenol (or something). I have no idea what it's used for, but apparently, it's effect on humans is as a very powerful muscle relaxant.

So much so, that just a few drops in an unsuspecting chump's drink, within the minute, they will release the sphincters holding any kind of bodily waste.

I.E - you piss and shit yourself on the spot.

The plan was to do this on a saturday night, in the 'hip' place to be in town, so that he would suffer the embarrassment of doing it in front of all of the hottest girls available to us. Not only that - on that night - he decided to wear light coloured trousers.

The atmosphere was electric - we were all so excited to see this horrendous act take place, yet had to reserve our emotions so as not to arouse suspicion.

On the way there, O got a call from his sister, who happened to be a nurse. He mentioned the plan to her, and she had heard of the said chemical, and informed him that 25% of the population are fatally allergic to it.

Most of us continued to egg him on regardless - it was a risk worth taking, but (with hindsight) sensibly, O decided not to go through with it.

Oh well - the idea was grand, but it never happened.
( HoratioFellatio Taking the the out of psychotherapist, Fri 14 Dec 2007, 1:28, 3 replies)

Might be
phenolpthalene, p'raps?

If memory serves, it's an indicator.

[We stole some from the chem labs one year at our school's open evening after Swanny (the chem tutor) told us it had laxative properties. A bunch of us then wandered down to the canteen and offered to help them out. It went in the squash jugs for the prospective students.

We legged it before the shit started to hit the fan (so to speak.)]
(greenycrimson I stole the from pyschotherapist, Fri 14 Dec 2007, 7:08, closed)

Phenolpthalene
Phenolpthalene is evil stuff! I handed a small vial of the stuff to my girlfriend to spike her hated English teacher's tea with. Instead of putting a few drops in she emptied the entire contents into the tea. The results were pretty much immediate and the poor guy spent the rest of the day crapping his guts out! I guess we were lucky that he survived!
( Vambo, Fri 14 Dec 2007, 11:00, closed)

Laxative
Plan old run of the mill eye drops will have the same affect. Just put a couple of drops of the stuff into someones drink and they will be shitting through the eye of a needle in no time.
(Kopite Ceoil agus Craic, Fri 14 Dec 2007, 11:33, closed)