The circus was in Liverpool

Not that I was bothered - i was more interested in having a beer with my mate..

T'was Kensington in Liverpool about 1999 and my mate had finshed uni - but stayed in the rented house to see out the lease - so i popped over to enjoy a few jars and not worry about getting a taxi home...

we only stayed local and after a few made our way to the Juke Box for some Nirvana et al.

Thats when we met him.

Picture 'Tom' from Father Ted ("Father - I Killed a man"). he introduced himself (i can't remember his name) he was out with some friends who, it turned out were travelling with the circus that was down the road. He was Scottish and seemed okay - but he did most of the talking. He kind of latched onto us and joined our table...the drinks started to flow and much banter was had...

Our plan had been to go back after the pub for a 'smoke and a movie'. It was at his point that it went wrong.

"you wanna come back for a smoke?

Of course he did...

He skinned up with the skill of a thousand Bob Marleys and the smell of weed filled the air. I wasn't a big smoker then and i'm certainly not now - but i was properly stoned by now. So we started to ask him about his 'Carnie' life.

He then rolled off these stories about how many people he has killed for money he's also a dab hand with a knife if you know anyone who needs stabbing. by this point me and my mate are sobering up and making eye contact type gestures of 'how the fuck do we get rid of him' - all the while he's skinning up and handing out doobies.

You may presume these were just tall tales, but after spending an evening with him -i had very little reason not to believe him.

"I've got a couple of guns back in my caravan if you want see em? I can get you past security, they're cool - i'll just say your coming back for a drink"

By this point, i'm mentally running through various scenarios and planning my escape route - all ending in a violent death. but as long as he was smoking he seemed calm...

Que me and my mate performing exaggerated yawns and looking at our watches as we both agree that the only way we can get this maniac out of the house is by preying on any sense of decency he might have had and make him think he's out-stayed his welcome.

4 hours later and he's leaving. 4 of the most scary/bizarre hours of my life involving a Scottish murdering circus worker.

I was too scared to vomit over his hedge...
(Pat mustard, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 21:33, 1 reply)

Kenny
How I miss your one way system.

I had the hottest pizza know to man from a takeaway in Kenny. Who puts bird's eye chillies on a pizza? A pint with each slice; I had to give up when I ran out of cider.
(xaer0mancer, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 22:13, closed)