negotiation
with the other side:

lawyer one: i'd like to speak without prejudice if i may

lawyer two: shit shit that means he wants to talk about a settlement naturally you may

lawyer one: fuck now i have to make the offer, what did the dumb client say again? pursuant to clause 3(3)(x) your client covenanted to carry out repairs

lawyer two: shit he's getting technical and i haven't read the lease, where the hell is it... aha, section 18 cap!

lawyer one: oh god i can never remember the second limb of that what in the name of my giant pants is he ranting on about? section 18 of which act? i don't um think that applies here

lawyer two: shit, do i mean s18? better check... well, why don't you take your client's instructions and revert?

lawyer one: instructions? on what?? that i will. good day.

both: bill: £1,000 plus vat: without prejudice negotiations with landlord/tenant's representative...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 15:49, 17 replies)

Are you attempting to imply
that lawyers can't really justify the astronomical fees which they charge?

I don't believe that at all.

Never.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 16:14, closed)

Suddenly...
... I feel a twinge of sympathy for our put-upon lawyer community.

:)
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 16:18, closed)

I often feel
a twinge when thinking of lawyers. Because to me, lawyers means miss swipe.

But then I realise that lawyers also means my sister. And I feel bad.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 16:24, closed)

al
depends what sort of a twinge it is.....

but yeah, 90% of being a junior lawyer is blagblagblag!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 16:27, closed)

It doesn't really work does it
I was going for a sort of sexual metaphor where "twinge" meant "tumescent penis" and then with my sister being involved it being all wrong and dirty. But it didn't really work. I apologise.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 16:31, closed)

it would work
if you were welsh??

(only joking)
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 16:41, closed)

Or
If I were from Norfolk.

(has been to Norfolk)

(isn't kidding)
(Bazongaloid, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 16:44, closed)

yeah...
i wasn't really kidding about rural wales, either. took my friends to pick up their puppy from a farm in the middle of NOWHERE. am sure we couldn't see the father because it was actually the farmer.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 16:46, closed)

Was this
the magnificent breast shitting on puppy?

(as in the puppy was magnificent, though I heard the breasts were too)
(Bazongaloid, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 16:56, closed)

the same incontinent beast
the magnificent whaps were most unimpressed and wilted sadly under the onslaught of canine diarrhoea. stupid animal.

it's bloody cute now, though. can jump about 15 times its own height when there's a sausage at stake. or a bit of whatwhat. it is the randiest dog EVER.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 17:03, closed)

What is
your obsession with whatwhat, now I have that sodding Samwell song in my head. It took me weeks to get it out. Weeks I tell you!

Ah sod it, I just lost the game too.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 17:04, closed)

it's because
it is so grim. the smug expression on his face when he says: you wanna do it in my butt? oookaaay.

ming!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 17:05, closed)

Damn.
After a long a difficult day, which should never be the case on a Friday; I thought I'd have a look through QOTW while I waited for 5:30 to roll around.

Now I have that damn song in my head again... I don't want it there. How can I make it stop?
( Moey, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 17:18, closed)

you just go with the flow and sing it out loud!!

I said, what what, in the butt
I said, what what, in the butt
I said, what what, in the butt
I said, what what, in the butt
You wanna do it in my butt, in my butt?
You wanna do it in my butt, in my butt?
You wanna do it in my butt, in my butt?
Let's do it in the butt, okay

I feel you watching me
Over there
Come to me
If you care
Don't sit and stare
It's just not fair
Make your move
If you dare
What what

I said, what what, in the butt
I said, what what, in the butt
I said, what what, in the butt
I said, what what, in the butt
You wanna do it in my butt, in my butt?
You wanna do it in my butt, in my butt?
You wanna do it in my butt, in my butt?
Let's do it in the butt, okay

It's okay
To have a little fight
Don't you worry
I won't bite (Not that hard)
If you want it
I'll give you power
Just be gentle
I'm delicate like a flower

I said, what what, in the butt
I said, what what, in the butt
I said, what what, in the butt
I said, what what, in the butt
You wanna do it in my butt, in my butt?
You wanna do it in my butt, in my butt?
You wanna do it in my butt, in my butt?
Let's do it in the butt, okay

I will give you what you need
All I want is your big fat seed
Give it to me, if you please
Give it to me, if you please
I will give you what you need
All I want is your big fat seed
Give it to me, if you please
Give it to me, if you please

What what, in the butt
I said, what what, in the butt
I said, what what, in the butt
I said, what what, in the butt
You wanna do it in my butt, in my butt?
You wanna do it in my butt, in my butt?
You wanna do it in my butt, in my butt?
Let's do it in the butt, okay
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 17:33, closed)

"I'm delicate like a flower"
and "I want your big fat seed" do not correlate.

That song is a big pile of confuse.
( Kroney, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 17:38, closed)

@ kroney
have you seen the video?

as an hetero bloke, you might find it quite winceworthy.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 17:39, closed)

No no no no nooooo
That's just made it so much worse.

I need to drink until I forget, everything, again.
( Moey, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 17:46, closed)