I thought I knew how to keep a clean house
Apparently not.
Shortly after moving in to a new flat with my ex, she chided me for not cleaning the bathroom 'properly'. I looked at it again and said 'Well, it looks clean to me.' She shook her head and went off in a huff. I found out what I had done wrong when it was her turn to do the cleaning the following week. She had run a bath and put all the bottles of shampoo, conditioner and shower gel in 'to give them a wash, because they get dirty too.'
Silly me, I never knew. And I nearly induced apoplexy when I mistakenly put a spoon in the fork section of the cutlery drawer.
( ThisCaledonianClown has left it far too late, Thu 25 Mar 2010, 15:39, 4 replies)

Should have put a fork through her head
and told her that is where they are to be kept from now on.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 25 Mar 2010, 15:41, closed)

I was going to give a "Get out now!" warning
but on re-reading I see "ex".

Dodged a bullet there didn't ya.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 25 Mar 2010, 15:44, closed)

Oh yes.
There were plenty of warning signs. The handwritten 10-step instructions on how to make her a 'proper' cup of tea? The ritual of her dividing up every meal into 20 identical-sized pieces before eating each portion like Keith from 'Nuts in May'? The intricate cross-hatching she slashed on her upper arms?
( ThisCaledonianClown has left it far too late, Thu 25 Mar 2010, 15:58, closed)

Any one of these should have told you to leg it.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 25 Mar 2010, 16:27, closed)

Nah.
One of these sort of signs is merely a blip. Two, you sit up and pay attention, assess carefully. Three or more, and that's when you reach for the running shoes. Or am I unnaturally tolerant?
(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Thu 25 Mar 2010, 19:22, closed)

I'm learning (and becoming less tolerant)
The most recent girlfriend said I was 'taking the piss' when I left a dirty plate in the sink one afternoon. She was yet another bleach junkie. It ended soon after.
( ThisCaledonianClown has left it far too late, Thu 25 Mar 2010, 20:09, closed)

No excuses
For mixing up cutlary, you hear?
(The Boy Monders I have ginger bits in my beard., Thu 25 Mar 2010, 15:48, closed)

That's what you get...
... for moving in with your ex.
(sabre-tooth monkey, Thu 25 Mar 2010, 16:15, closed)

valid point

(Mensa Reject has gone out, I'll be back on, Fri 26 Mar 2010, 0:33, closed)