Have you ever started a fire?I went to sleep with candles burning - woke up to a circle of flame on the rug. Thought, "Tits. Better put the rug in the bath and turn the taps on." TIP: Don't put a burning rug into a fibre glass bath. I caused about £5000 of damage to the house and was coughing up smoky black phlegm for a few weeks. Can you beat that?
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rob, Tue 2 Mar 2004, 17:48)
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Poor B*st*rdMet this girl while out to dinner with my boss. She said she wanted a date. Great, met her the next evening - only one problem, it was a double date with her, her boyfriend and her room-mate. Seems the room-mate wouldn't leave them alone and I was the diversion.
After drinks, dancing we all went back to his apartment for coffee after which I was to take the room-mate home.
While everyone is in the kitchen, I'm sitting on a lovely white couch smoking a camel and surveying the scene - suddenly I smell smoke - "Hey everybody does anyone smell smoke?" - nobody but me smells smoke. Minutes later they walk back to where I'm sitting and they start staring behind me. Holy shit the couch is on fire, smoke pouring out of the back.
The guy sets a really nice silver coffee set on the glass table in front of the couch and we both move the couch out and start tearing at the fabric to get at the fire, someone else gets water in a jug and pours it on the couch, the room-mate trys to move the glass table but only succeeds in ripping the top off and spraying coffee all over the opposite wall.
I've demolished the couch, the room-mate has put a spectacular brown stain on the opposite wall, and the other couple get their wish - I brought the room-mate home.
The moral? Don't date me - I still smoke.
(, Tue 2 Mar 2004, 22:15, Reply)
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