You clearly don't read local newspapers.

Dear sir, I note with some distress that there are two new speed cameras on the A127 between...lengthy diatribe about how they got a speeding ticket driving at 'only' 90 at 2am on an empty road...ad hominemn attack on local council...something about do good green movement...
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 9:19, 3 replies)

I just blast the speed cameras with my shotgun as I drive past them.

( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 9:26, closed)

I find it difficult to aim if my supermodel girlfriend is fellating me as I drive
Although the road handling* of the Accord is pretty good.


*I don't really know what this term means
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 9:29, closed)

I assumed you meant the hand job she was giving you

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 9:38, closed)

I have the problem of deciding which super model twin sister should fellate me while I drive.
I also find the gold plating on my Accord can be a bit dazzling sometimes.
( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 9:46, closed)

Here in my city they were forced to put up a sign informing drivers that the limit was 30mph next to one of the speed cameras
After hundreds of complaints from drivers who did not know that was the speed limit. "I was only doing 40mph, why have I been fined?"
A police spokesman said: "Sheesh!"
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 9:27, closed)

Well, I do
but I have never seen, and can hardly imagine anyone actually writing that letter.
(username failed moderation, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 10:00, closed)

That took all of two seconds to find. Although it's not actually a letter, the principle is the same:
www.cotswoldjournal.co.uk/news/9563269.Speed_trap_police____are_being_sneaky___/
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 10:04, closed)

I can't see the bit where he's
doing 90 at 2am.

Oh, wait, you were just making that up! Enough of this, I have to work.

Great thread, as always.
(username failed moderation, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 10:55, closed)

What are you blithering about?
I gave an example of the type of thing I meant. Is that too difficult a concept for you to get your head round?

Just for clarity, the letter also didn't use the exact words "lengthy diatribe", "ad hominemn attack on local council" or "something about do good green movement"...
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 11:07, closed)