Epiphany

My "road to Damascus", the moment I *really* started to believe in God, was on a shooting trip to Scotland.

I was in the butts waiting for the beaters to drive the birds towards and was chatting to my shooting partner - who I'd only met 5 minutes ago. It turned out he was a vicar. We chatted for a few minutes nad then the birds started to fly towards us.

I aimed and pulled the trigger:

"Missed the bastard I muttered"

The vicar looked pained.

"Please don't curse or God will strike you down" he said and then turned and downed a grouse.

I fired again and again missed.

"Shite! Missed the fucker again" I cursed.

The vicar looked at me and said:

"Please my son. Cursing incurs God's wrath and if you do it one more time then He will surely strike you down!"

"Yeah, yeah" I muttered and turned to take another shot.

I aimed, lined the bird up and pulled the trigger..

"Jesus Fucking H Christ! How the shuddering FUCK did I miss that one!!!"

Then the sky darkened, the clouds rolled in and torrential rain poured down. Out of the clouds a lone lightening bolt flashed out and struck the vicar smack in the head.

"Missed the fucker" boomed the thunder...


Cheers

Thenk you very much. I'll be under the pier all week....
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Fri 20 Mar 2009, 12:57, 1 reply)

I remember
a very much toned down version of that joke from my Puffin joke book, ca 1976, by Bronnie Cunningham.

But it's still funny.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 20 Mar 2009, 13:29, closed)