Helicopter ParentsBack when young ScaryDuck worked in the Dole office rather than simply queuing in it, he had to deal with a claimant brought in by his mum. She did all the talking. He was 40 years old.
Have you had to deal with over-protective parents? Get your Dad to tell us all about it.
(
chthonic, Thu 10 Sep 2009, 15:13)
« Go Back
That's no geek!As I have previously mentioned, my Mum tended on the protective side when it tended to my upbringing. Not so much a helicopter parent as an Apache armed with Sidewinder missiles of maternal wrath. Which were unleashed at anyone who hurt her darling son, with an anger which would make the Furies themselves think "Blimey, steady on a bit!" Thankfully in recent years, she has chilled out a lot, but still, it makes for very entertaining stories when she's had a few of Mr Foster's finest cans of Australian pisswater.
One of her favourites, which perversely I am rather proud of, is when I was mugged by the local hard man. Or as I preferred to call him, a cock-faced donkey rapist. I should perhaps clarify I'm not proud of being mugged- I should have stuck up for myself, but he was bigger than me and blew smoke in my face. But Mum's reaction remains with me to this day, and when you think of it, was quite inventive.
She knew the police could do bugger all, it was his word against mine, and despite being all well-spoken and middle-class, it wouldn't cut any mustard with the CPS, or Criminal Placation System as she referred to them at the time.
Anyway, to the point. Mum and I were at this point about the same size, and with a hood up, you'd be hard-pressed to tell the difference. Which the jizz-guzzling son of a buttmonkey couldn't, poor him. She put my coat on, and stalked off into the night, baseball bat in hand, on a lone quest, in search of my assailant. And she found him. And cornered him. And then proceeded to beat seven shades of shit out of him.
And then drove off in her Honda Accord.
/Joke
Perhaps a little too far that time Mum.
(
jim_bob can herd cats., Fri 11 Sep 2009, 12:55,
4 replies)
Does she driveA Honda Accord?
Nice story, have a click.
(
gareth_alien will be human again at, Fri 11 Sep 2009, 12:58,
closed)
No.More mums should do this.
Your mum is ace.
(, Fri 11 Sep 2009, 12:58, closed)
Your mum wins at life!Clickity click.
(, Sun 13 Sep 2009, 3:12, closed)
So to clarifyshe beat someone up but made it look like you did it so you'd take the fall for it if he went to the police.
That's some good parenting right there.
(, Sun 13 Sep 2009, 19:44, closed)
« Go Back