A story from my local paper about 2 years ago.
It was the middle of summer and an poor old lady had just used her savings to splash out on a brand new, uber swish, top of the range mobility scooter. She'd been pretty much housebound for a few years and her daughter had moved away so she didnt have much help.

She'd hosed down her back yard so she left the scooter in the back street while she went to watch Coronation Street and waited for the ground to dry.

Corro's finished and she comes out to find no scooter. Some little scamps had gotten drunk off their dad's beer, hotwired the scooter and driven it down to the canal and it had fallen in.

I dont know if she ever got a new one.

And I dont know where 12 year olds learn to hotwire either
(i should have joined myspace, Sun 14 Dec 2008, 18:21, 12 replies)

i'm beginning to quite fancy you

( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Sun 14 Dec 2008, 19:10, closed)

I could say the same of you, Mr. S.
What a difficult love-triangle this could be.
( Cawl, Sun 14 Dec 2008, 19:15, closed)

it gets worse
im filming the whole thing and jacking off onto the curtains
(Halfy By light alone, Sun 14 Dec 2008, 19:31, closed)

I know...
I saw the film of you filming it...
( Cawl, Sun 14 Dec 2008, 19:34, closed)

the outtakes
put me off my dinner, it made 2 girls 1 cup look sexy
(Halfy By light alone, Sun 14 Dec 2008, 19:50, closed)

I assume you've seen
This:
lbn.threat.tv/jarsquatter.swf
VERY, VERY NSFW.
( Cawl, Sun 14 Dec 2008, 19:52, closed)

pff
thats just a bit of light foreplay for me






/bokes
(Halfy By light alone, Sun 14 Dec 2008, 19:54, closed)

Haha!
I've got a sudden craving for pickled onions...
( Cawl, Sun 14 Dec 2008, 19:56, closed)

i have
ham and pickled onions sandwiches!
(Halfy By light alone, Sun 14 Dec 2008, 19:57, closed)

Oh...
Er... Good for you!
You won't be allowed to take a packed lunch with you though.
The only food in Hell is watery leek and carrot soup.
Really watery.
( Cawl, Sun 14 Dec 2008, 20:06, closed)

noooo
the only food available in Hell is american food

You are clearly jealous of my pickled onions
(Halfy By light alone, Sun 14 Dec 2008, 20:14, closed)

thanks
thats so nasty I had to close after several blood soaked seconds. Congratulations, officially sickened.

but breakfastime . . . now complete
(maggotriddendirtbox fast, feral and sharp as a tack since, Sun 14 Dec 2008, 22:20, closed)