Tenuous but revelant ...
I am packing for my first trip outside the city of my abode for a decade. Yes really. I've got kids, you see. Lovely things, but they do tend to slow you down, like a pair of pretty little ball and chains.

So, the occasion is a family Christening. How wholesome! Arranged to fly out this Saturday with my Mum and my eldest daughter. The cunting airline cancelled our flight out and notified me by EMAIL!

Yesterday.

After saying FUCK a lot, I managed to arrange a flight out on the previous day. The bloody airline will not, however, spring for our accommodation. Being seriously last minute, I had to take whatever I could find.

Stick with me folks, relevance to QOTW imminent.

The only accommodation I could find was a Queen and single room for my Mum, my eight year old daughter and myself to share. How cosy.

So I'm packing and muttering obscenities to myself over the blasted inconvenience of it all, when the other shoe drops.

You see, I sleep nude.

Bit of a FUCKING PROBLEM when I will be sharing a room with my aforementioned mother and my wee daughter.

I don't HAVE any nighties or naughties for that matter. I enjoy the caress of clean sheets on my naked skin and the warm embrace of my beloved husband ...

Where were we?

Oh yes, so I was ferretting through the bottom of my drawers (quiet at the back) looking for something, ANYTHING to wear to bed and my search has turned up;

- a black lacy peephole nightie, slightly ripped and mysteriously stained
and
- the blue dowdy nightdress I wore to the bloody maternity ward eight years ago, still smelling faintly of breastmilk.

Great.
(Que?, Tue 8 May 2012, 3:39, 19 replies)

what?
you or your husband don't own a t-shirt between you? you don't possess a vest top and a pair of knickers?

be honest. the point of this post was 'THINK ABOUT ME NAKED!!', wasn't it? oh dear.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Tue 8 May 2012, 5:48, closed)

^ What she said. This is nonsense.
(MayorBoris, Tue 8 May 2012, 8:26, closed)

Janet, please, PLEASE
for the love of god, don't post things that make us think of female posters naked.
(username failed moderation, Tue 8 May 2012, 9:48, closed)

SHE STARTED IT.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Tue 8 May 2012, 10:46, closed)

Any more
and you'll both go to bed without tea.

Oh. That's not helping.
(username failed moderation, Tue 8 May 2012, 17:11, closed)

Mmmmmmmm, breasts.
I like breasts.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Wed 9 May 2012, 2:15, closed)

All I got from this was:
I can't work a washing machine, yet I still managed to snag me a husband.

Chinny-reckon, my dear, chinny-reckon. I bet it's awfully cold in bed, alone, crying into your pillow. Call it the warm embrace of your beloved husband all you want, but we all know that it's the lice, swarming over you.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 8 May 2012, 8:28, closed)

How fat are you?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 8 May 2012, 10:02, closed)

Chubby-chasing?

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 8 May 2012, 12:08, closed)

SOMEONE GAZ SEXFACE!

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Tue 8 May 2012, 16:10, closed)

always.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 8 May 2012, 16:24, closed)

What sort of emotional disaster can't be naked with their mother or child?

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 8 May 2012, 20:24, closed)

Mental image :)

(D.I.pshit solved another case on, Tue 8 May 2012, 21:22, closed)

I sleep in the nip but I still own PJs and nighties.
And even if I didn't, I've got t-shirts and at a push the hubby has old t-shirts or shirts I could use.
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Tue 8 May 2012, 22:17, closed)

Ok, you've got us thinking about you naked.
Now, PICTURES OF YOUR MUM NAKED OR IT NEVER HAPPENED!
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Wed 9 May 2012, 2:16, closed)

Rumbled ...
Okay folks, you got me. The knickers and T-shirt option would be a good-un except ... I don't shave.

I don't fancy having my overgrown lady garden spilling out either side of my knickers. It'd look like a potted fern in a plastic carrier bag.
(Que?, Wed 9 May 2012, 3:13, closed)

jesus wept.
you really are the gift that keeps on giving.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 9 May 2012, 5:37, closed)

i reckon david bellamy could be alive and well and ideing out down there

( fluffybunnykiller Is feasting on the clitoris of life, Wed 9 May 2012, 7:56, closed)

PAGING DOCTOR GONZO!

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 9 May 2012, 16:10, closed)