Big Gay Rhys
In the spirit of 'trying to tell more of a story' it is time to tell the story of Big Gay Rhys.

Well, you can work out a lot about him from his name. He was Welsh. He was 6'3". And he was gay.
Not camp-as-a-row-of-pink-frilly-chiffon-tents gay, just normal-guy-who-happens-to-prefer-cock gay.
He was part of the bunch of lads with whom I used to watch the rugby and drink, back in my uni days. But on one fateful night of post-match-boozing, the conversation turned to fuckable celebrities. Everybody else in the group ran off the predictable list of unattainable ladies, but Big Gay Rhys stayed silent. He'd only come out to us very recently, and was still shy about it.

Me: "Come on Rhys. We're all open-minded guys here. We know you're gay."
Rhys: "I can't. It's dead embarrassing."
Me: "Rhys. It's nearly Christmas. In two weeks, you've got to go home and pretend to like that ginger girl from the chipshop, for your Nan's sake. Get it off your chest."
Rhys: "But..."
Me: "We won't think any less of you, whatever you say."
Rhys: "...you promise?"
Me (looking round my cohorts' carefully serious faces): We promise.
Rhys: Well...him off Star Trek, like.
Me: What, Captain Kirk? Mister Spock? That bald guy?
Rhys: mumble mumble
Me: Sorry mate, didn't quite catch that.
Rhys: mumble mumble mumble..
Me: Speak up there, man!
Rhys: WESLEY FUCKING CRUSHER, ALRIGHT?
...
Rhys: Only when he was grown-up, only when he was grown-up!
...

And that is the story of how Captain Rhys got his name.
His Nan thinks he was on the rugby team, and if anybody ever tells his Da what 'boldly going' actually referred to, he'll be cut off in a jiffy.
(universalpsykopath loves what you've done with your hair., Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:10, 4 replies)

FInally a decent post with funnies
*clicks*
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 7 Oct 2011, 10:29, closed)

Friend of mine,
had a thing for Beverley Crusher. A bit like fancying your own mum, to my mind.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 7 Oct 2011, 11:06, closed)

So long as your mum looked like Beverley Crusher...

( Hunter Stockton was murdered by a bicycle wielding axolotl,.,.,.,., Fri 7 Oct 2011, 14:07, closed)

Yes, but the woman who played Beverly Crusher was a grown-up.

(universalpsykopath loves what you've done with your hair., Fri 7 Oct 2011, 14:40, closed)