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This is a question Iffy crushes

Who would you like to have sex with who isn't probably top of everyone's list and why?

(, Thu 6 Oct 2011, 14:54)
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This question is now closed.

I have a thing for tv scientists...

Prof Kathie Sykes
Dr Alice Robertson
and as the latest addition: Lucy Worsley

(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 22:31, 1 reply)
that woman of the telly who had no legs and arms if she was on top that would be an iffy crush

(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 21:32, 2 replies)
I probably shouldn't admit this, but... this is kinda hot.


(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 21:20, 8 replies)
My second grade teacher, still
She was one of a bunch of young, progressive and stunning school teachers that the district brought in during the early 70s. And she was the hottest, without a doubt. She had frosted hair and dressed like Mary Tyler Moore.

I ran into her again when I was in college, doing my internship, 14 years later or so. She had to be late 30s, early 40s and was still an incredible knockout. I would've, as I had a better idea of what sex was about than when I was seven years.

Unfortunately, I also met her husband, whose marble company was doing work for the new building where I did my internship. He was handsome, charming, rich... The bastard.

I still see her face on real estate signs (she sells homes). The years have been good to her.
(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 20:58, Reply)
Sarah Jane off cbeebies
Oh yes
(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 19:28, 14 replies)
not now
although it wasn't much better then, to be honest.

when i was about 13, for some utterly inexplicable reason, i had a crush on john major for about a week. this was stupid enough, but telling my friends? that was even more stupid. it took years to live that one down, and i had the ghostly image of his grey face and specs on my english lit file after they covered it in pictures of him for the whole of my GCSEs.

i would not nibble on his peas these days.
(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 18:23, 8 replies)
Now that this QOTW has long since run out of real answers,
what we need is wave upon wave of gut-churningly awful, convoluted shaggy dog stories and other puns on the phrase "Iffy crushes" that make you feel like you've just wasted five minutes of your life reading them to tide us over till Thursday. It's the only ingredient missing so far. Remember, folks:

Good QOTW = stories
Bad QOTW = crippling social retards and shite puns.
(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 18:04, 7 replies)
Cheryl Cole.
Hah, not really, the skinny, dour-faced cow.
(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 17:57, Reply)
I've just remembered another one .....
I was quite young when the original Reggie Perrin aired but I do remember thinking his wife was rather delightful.

Check here if you don't believe me.

(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 17:05, 2 replies)
lol not really
(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 16:50, 4 replies)
oh god, i'd almost forgotten this
as a wee Smash, i'd sit with my siblings of an evening and watch telly. we were all very keen on a show called You Bet!, mostly for the daft stunts people would do.
however, there was another reason i watched: Matthew Kelly. yes, i had a huge crush on that beardy weirdy, all the way through my early years and into my teens. i can't explain it, i have absolutely no idea why i liked him, i just know that i did.
i still get stick off my brother and sisters about that one. i can't say i blame them.
(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 16:47, 8 replies)
I thought this question rang a bell.....
From: QOTW Suggestions in May:

Oddly attractive
We've had inappropriately sensual, but how about oddly attractive?

There's a girl that works in the cafeteria at work, probably mid-twenties, about 4' 10", I.Q. about 75, personality of a cartoon rabbit (and I don't mean Cadbury's Caramel, I mean Thumper from Snow White, or the little girl rabbit from Robin Hood), and yet...and yet....

I would.

Given the chance and the usual alternate universe scenario caveat.

Who do you fancy, although you really shouldn't?
(Che Grimsdale I like Marmite, but I can take it or leave it, Wed 25 May 2011, 11:37,

And while I'm at it, here's another of mine from August:

What about a rant?
How would you fix Britain / the US / Oz etc?

I'd force sterilisation on anyone that went to the supermarket in their pyjamas for one.

I'd put the obesity clinic on the ninth floor and put the lifts out of order - while making attendance at obesity clinic a condition of receiving benefit.

I'd also stop Child Benefit for anyone on higher rate tax.

And I'd return pub closing time to 11.00 and not allow alcohol to be served in clubs after that time.

I'd also introduce 'slow lanes' on pavements.
(Che Grimsdale I like Marmite, but I can take it or leave it, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 10:44,

Remind you of anything?

Not that I'm precious or anything, but no-one like a plagiarist....well, except on the internet.
(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 16:43, 3 replies)
Madame Bartlett, my year 6 french teacher, in hindsight she lookedabit like gerard depardieu

(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 16:32, Reply)
the dirty old bastard
(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 15:48, 5 replies)
Alright, I'm noticing a distinct 'older lady' feel to my thoughts now,
but Lois from Malcolm in the Middle (is it Jane Kaczmarek or something?) and Catherine Tate. They both have a slightly dodgy eye thing going on that affects me strangely. I feel i should now step away from the internet.
(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 15:28, 2 replies)
Jennifer Tilly.
It's not even for the two most obvious reasons. She just acts so dumb i can't help myself.

Once again, the massive norks have almost nothing to do with it, probably.
(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 15:21, 2 replies)
I have had sex with every singel person listed below

(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 14:54, 12 replies)
A carrot and stick approach...
I’ve often thought that hell isn’t to be found in a single location. It’s more a shifting vortex which can be found under the feet of one man. A bombastic, yet shadowy character, whose role as Tony Blair’s confidante and ultimate involvement the dossiers which argued the case for WMDs will no doubt be discussed by political scholars for years to come.

A man so vitriolic and full of self-important rage that he’s widely thought to be the inspiration for Malcolm Tucker.
And yet, every time I hear his shouty Yorkshire accent, or see him verbally sparring on the TV with a political journalist or hapless MP, I think, fuck me, I totally would.

It pains me to admit it, but I have a very, very iffy crush on Alastair Campbell.

Don’t Do judge me...
(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 13:19, 10 replies)
Joe Tracini
DK from Coming of Age.

Begin your judgement of me.
(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 13:09, 3 replies)
My mum
Bindun ?

If so by who ?

Edit: whom by ?
(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 11:53, 5 replies)
Lucy Liu? Mel C? Anne Hathaway?
For fuck's sake ... !

How does one "ignore" the entirety of QOTW for the remainer of the week?
(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 11:43, 16 replies)
Lucy Liu
I don't know what it is, I don't even find her hugely attractive, just quite spectacularly sexy.

See also, Summer Glau.
(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 11:21, 2 replies)
Skinny Birds
Just love seeing a bit of rib and collarbone on a laydee who could do with eating a few more sarnies.

Three iffy lasses jump immediately to mind which give rise to a lazy lob on.

Suzie Dent, yeah I know she has been mentioned quite a few times, but still worth repeating.

Kirsten O'Brien. Bit chubby now, but if anybody fancies a DT with her and her two cock gob, let me know.

Hermione Cockburn from Coast. Mmmmmoist.
(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 10:30, Reply)
Fuck! Biscuit!
Am I alone in thinking that the woman with Tourrette's on that Stephen Fry show last night was utterly...FUCK...adorable...BISCUIT?
(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 10:22, 4 replies)
Miranda Hart
Not really.
(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 9:12, 3 replies)
My cat was sat upon by..
..an ex-footballer who played as a striker for Gillingham and Swindon Town, having also had spells with Huddersfield Town, Mansfield Town, Sheffield United, Wycombe Wanderers, Grimsby Town, Tranmere Rovers and Walsall.
I wish I could remember the name of this particular sportsman who then went on to manage the Ethiopian national team.
(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 8:45, 2 replies)
Does this count?

(, Mon 10 Oct 2011, 8:38, 6 replies)

This question is now closed.

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