Birthday
In a bid to out weird-birthday-present each other me and a mate have got each other some utter crap.

At the pub on my 22nd birthday, he handed me a carrier bag with my present in. A 2-pound lump hammer, a pair of garden shears and a big bag of dried anchovies.

In retaliation, I bought a slightly damaged prosthetic leg from a guy I knew that was upgrading and gift-wrapped it for him.

In the pub, with the aid of a belt, we strapped his leg up out of the way and managed to attach the false limb to his folded knee. From the right angle, it looked almost real, from the other 350-degrees of viewpoints, it looked like the most unpolitically correct thing you ever did see.

To add to the effect, I gave him a sign around his neck which said "Support the Amputee Society"

At throwing out time, we calculated that had we not been so honest, we'd have left the pub at least £60 better off.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Thu 21 May 2009, 12:20, Reply)