After being with the lady for a year, we moved in
which consitutes the MIL-ness of the situation.

So we move in to a charming little ex-Communist apartment (in Warsaw) just 300m from the MILs pad. We've been going to her parents most Sundays for fat Polish meals (they are MASSIVE) which used to involve an hour's bus ride across the city.
On the first night we moved in, completely knackered after lugging the fridge, washing machine, sofa and fooking huge TV up to the 8th floor, we collapse on the bed and fall asleep.

Cue MIL calling us up in floods of tears at 5pm, wailing her tits off, because we havent invited her over yet to have a nose around the apartment. We've only had the keys for 6 hours and the charming lady is hurling her lungs through the phone line about how ungratefully her no good daughter is, and how Im bound to leave her when I realise the full extent of her uselessness, ingratitude and general waste-of-spacity.

She's wonderful to me though - her English is only a few words better than my Polish, but around the dinner table we usually get a good chuckle when she pokes me saying "you need more meat, you English thin man," and I reply "sorry, I gave all my meat to your daughter..."

(me, the gf, the sister-in-law, the father-in-law, all pissing themselves at the MIL's blank half-smiling confusion to this statement)
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Sat 10 Sep 2005, 23:30, Reply)