Karma Out of Balance
I'm going to apologise now for lack of funny.
While completing my Teacher training I was working at a local school in my home town, it's a bit rough and had it's fair share of chavs going there.

There was one such student (M) who I had the pleasure of teaching (I'm still learning and the staff decided to give me a disillusioned, low achieving group and little to no guidance on it for a subject I'd never taught).

M was one of the worst students I'd ever taught, he was a bully, he even tried bullying teachers in the school. He'd managed to make one teacher leave the school and I believe the profession as well, he had a terrible attitude when he turned up to class and even when he was there it was impossible to teach with him in the room, constant interruptions, messing with his cohorts and no amount of sanctions worked.

I left that school not totally equipped for teaching and this reflected in my inablility to get a job (I ended up doing supply teaching for 2 years after this) I later found out the school in question were not even sending out references when requested so that must have looked brilliant for me although nothing was ever mentioned during my time at the school about any sort of lack of satisfaction with my progress but this is besides the point.

I am heading to work one day when I find out that there had been a massive crash up the road from where I live. A group of youths had been speeding down a local road, lost control of the car and hit a van then ploughed onto the pavement and into a wall of another local school, killing a number of the occupants including M. This occurred in the wee small hours of the morning so the pathway was empty, but could have been so much worse at any other hour.

I wonder what would have happened if M had not died in that crash, what would have happened and what would he become.

I remember thinking at the time that I could see it coming for him and at the same time hating myself for judging that way. I still regret that thought now a number of years on and ensure that I am not as judgemental as I once was.

It was a needless death that could have been prevented at any number of events in his life, perhaps some fault is mine for not being the great teacher I wanted to be.

Since then I've met a number of ex students from that school who I taught (I'm still local to the area and see them in the odd pub) and they've since let me know that i was an ok teacher and I'm pretty glad that that they turned out ok (one owns a business and the other is an up and coming boxer).

Sorry about length and the lack of humour but I feel better for having got it out of my system.

I agree with FrankSpencer:
Fuck Karma - there is no such thing, we attempt to connect things together to give balance to the good and the bad and hope it adds up. All we can do is try to do the right thing at the right time and hope it all works out.
(Fuckarma was masturbating into your handbag, Fri 22 Feb 2008, 13:47, 7 replies)

Odd, isn't it...
... that whenever a child dies it's always the brightest and best-loved in the class. Never the ones whose backs we're secretly glad to see...
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Fri 22 Feb 2008, 13:57, closed)

Of course there's Karma....
Look at Donald Trump's hair for God's sake.
( girlinthehole, Fri 22 Feb 2008, 13:58, closed)

Very true
I have real issues with karma.

I know this one woman, just turned seventy. Her bully of a husband has made her life hell, to the point where he's stopped her seeing her own grandkids. Turned out he had a series of affairs through the first twenty years of their married life too. The woman in question is decent, kind, loving and has never wished harm on anyone.

Where's karma, eh?

Then there's the old friend of mine who had the misfortune of being born with Cystic Fibrosis. Monumentally gifted, musically talented and loved by (a great many it seems!) ladies.

Karma was out for lunch that day.

There's the guy I used to work with, who took a great delight in making someone's life a misery. He harrassed me relentlessly over the course of five years with an obsessional zeal on his part, even pursuing me to the pages of b3ta in a twisted attempt to try and look funny.

He was the source of the rumour concerning one of the bosses and a female member of staff which resulted in a third party being hounded out of the firm, going to great lengths to ensure the third party was taking the rap for this and many other invented misdemeanours.

Why? Well, simply because he's afraid of being the guy everyone picks on. He's actually admitted this to me himself.

When you confront this guy head on, he's all smiles and "hello mate...", a coward of the lowest order and if there were such thing as karma he'd be the unfortunate sufferer of a very nasty bum disease.

In retrospect, I perhaps shouldn't have talked a couple of my friends out of taking this guy aside for a quiet word. Sorry, but it's a big lie.

You make your own karma.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 22 Feb 2008, 14:14, closed)

@Enzyme
This kid wasn;t one of the best or brightest, but he deserved a shot at redemption
(Fuckarma was masturbating into your handbag, Fri 22 Feb 2008, 14:41, closed)

sad story.
I know enough teachers that are frustrated by kids like these being in their classes but not one of them would wish an end like that on them. Hope you don't let it get to you too much, there's always the "maybe I could have prevented it" thing, but you never know. Maybe he enjoyed pissing about in your lessons enough that it prevented something happening worse, or sooner.

P.s. massively misplaced pedantry from me:

A cohort is a group. One person would rarely have several cohorts, just one cohort with several members.
( Mockingbird Practitioner of SCIENCE, Fri 22 Feb 2008, 15:05, closed)

Some reasons not to blame yourself:
I've had similar experiences - some truly hideous things have happened to people I've been close to, or at least known, and the feelings of guilt are unavoidable - "I could have prevented it". However, there are some good reasons to fight those feelings:

1 - People are the masters of their own destiny. you can't force someone to save themselves, especially if they are determined to self-destruct. Even if you are a teacher, you are not under a moral obligation so save anyone.
2 - If a butterfly beating its wings in a forest can cause a hurricane a hundred years later half way across the world, how are you to know what the correct course of action is, or what the consequences of your actions will be?
3 - No event has a single cause, or in fact less than a near-infinite number of causes.
4 - Cause and Effect is a bit philosophically suspect anyway.

Doesn't make it feel any easier though.

Apologies for lack of funny, but it seems to be that kind of discussion...
(Axeman Jim, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 15:21, closed)

Sounds like
Another benefit-scrounging, ASBO scumbag in the making. What would his kids have been like if he'd managed to breed?
(oneinthepink is at your cervix m'lady, Mon 25 Feb 2008, 12:51, closed)