Karma fucked me over good
I don't really believe in karma, but if it really does exist I am most certainly it's bitch. Here is how it got me (apologies for length).

A few years ago me and mrs Lakejen800 were going through a bit of a rough patch. Enter cute chick from work. Add the fact that I, well past my teen years, am as hormone crazed and irresponsible as ever and put the two of us together on a work night out. Smooching (and a bit of groping) happens but nothing worse and I really didn't think much more of it until monday morning at work.

Everything is fine until towards the end of the day cute chick and I end up in a tiny room with no windows. More kissing (though less groping, we were at work after all) and an agreement to meet up later happens. Over the next couple of weeks we see a lot of each other and also end up doing the horizontal mambo one night. And yes, we did use condom. The "relationship" more or less ended after that night, so I, in my infinite wisdom, decide to just let it go and pretend that nothing happened. for about 1 week...

Then it starts hurting when I pee, and my little guy starts to get covered in yellow, foul smelling goo. Sure enough, a quick trip to the doc confirms that I have chlamydia which of course means that I have to come clean to mrs Lakejen800 (something I really should have done anyways) so she can go see the doc as well. Now, you'd think that getting chlamydia would be enough of a punishment for infidelity but karma had only just started on me.

After a week or 2 chlamydia has been treated and things (sort of) patched up with mrs Lakejen800, when I suddenly get this lingering pain in my right heel. It gradually gets worse over the next weeks, to the extent where I litterally cannot walk without the assistance of some serious pain killers. several trips to doc and a visit to a specialist later I get the diagnosis: Something called Reiter's syndrome (or post-infective arthritis). It turns out that one in a zillion people who get chlamydia also develop Reiter's (okay a bit exaggerated, but makes for a better story) and I just happen to be that one. At this point both my feet and my right hand are swelled up like balloons and without the painkillers I would pretty much have been 100% invalid. Only bright point is that Reiter's syndrome in most cases is temporary. Of course, for one in a zillion people it is NOT temporary. I'm sure you can guess who is amongst one in a zillion again. Yep, yours truly develops chronic arthritis at an age of less than 30.

Fortunately it is not nearly as bad as it was a couple of years ago. My right hand seems to be ok (thank god I didn't have to learn how to wank with my left hand) and I don't use pain killers anymore. I can essentially walk normally, but every time I take a step I am reminded of that mistake I made one night.

Quite frankly, I think karma has been just a tad hard on me. Bastard.

PS. I don't know why I am posting this, as mrs Lakejen800 will undoubtedly kill me if she finds out (and she does quite often read these pages) so let me just try and save my ass in advance: I am sorry, please please please forgive me. I love you a lot.
(Lakejen800, Tue 26 Feb 2008, 13:03, 10 replies)

Wow
Seldom does Karma hit that fast and decisively, it sounds like you learned a tough lesson.
(Lurkaloid awarded wanking black belt on, Tue 26 Feb 2008, 13:18, closed)

She stayed with you?
She must really love you. Hope you're treating her well.
(Generator cannot be named for legal reasons, Tue 26 Feb 2008, 13:34, closed)

fingers crossed....
that you keep your dick in your trousers in future - you played away and caught a nasty cock disease, learn your lesson.
(TAZ220 Not giving a toss since, Tue 26 Feb 2008, 13:53, closed)

Galloping knob rot
It's life's way of showing you that fucking office slags behind your missus' back is wrong.
(Greencloud Wanted to go fishing on, Tue 26 Feb 2008, 13:59, closed)

You sir
Have been shafted.
((((InfraSound))) SUNN0))) > YOU!, Tue 26 Feb 2008, 15:00, closed)

it's not often
that life gives you such a clear lesson.
make sure you learn from it.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Tue 26 Feb 2008, 15:07, closed)

Sorry
To hear that... still, at least your still with your wife? Coulda been worse.
(Pointless as a chavs bathroom, Tue 26 Feb 2008, 17:11, closed)

That's strange...
It's rather unusual to get Chlamydia if you used a condom. It may be passed on through oral sex. Don't punch me, but are you sure your Missus was completely faithful throughout this time? Although, she may have been a silent carrier for some time.
(Cryptoprocta has abandoned the username of Voodoo Mary, Tue 26 Feb 2008, 23:22, closed)

The plot thickens!
Though "thickens" may be an inappropriate term....
( baw__bag contains traces of nuts on, Wed 27 Feb 2008, 4:11, closed)

It's not so bad with the left hand, actually.
(chase, Wed 27 Feb 2008, 17:02, closed)