A compendium of short, kid, stories
1) I was happily playing in my garden when I was about 1ish and my mum was doing something in the kitchen. There is a knock at the front door and my mum answers it to find a man holding out her daughter saying "is this yours?". No-one knows how I did it but the theory is that I squeezed between the fence and the garage (apparently impassable with brambles) and crawled out into the road where a drive stopped and brought me home.

2) The beardedwife took apart his parents telephone with a screwdriver when he was between 1 and 2 years old. His parents come in to find him doing this and struggle (and fail) to put the phone back together. Beardedwife returns to the phone when his parents aren't looking and puts it back together successfully. It even worked!

He also rolled off the bed and hit his head when his mum was changing him, which probably explains why he is the way he is.

3) I went missing one day. Nobody could find me. There were search parties sent out all through the neighbourhood. They were a gnats bollock away from calling the police when someone looked in my toybox where they found me... asleep on top of all my toys.
( Joliet, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 13:23, Reply)