Fucking kids.
I was in a newsagents in town a few weeks ago, getting my weekly copy of the New Scientist (yeah, I'm exciting...).

The girl at the till recognises me, and we have a bit of a smile and a chat, some pleasent flirting.

While this is going on, a bunch of ill-disciplined children are running about screaming, knocking things from the shelves, and generally pissing us off.

I shook my head and muttered "I hate fucking kids".

I then quickly realised what I'd said, and tried to cover it by saying "Er... Shit... I mean... I fucking hate kids. Not I hate fucking them."

She looked a little confused, and after a brief mental lag, she looked at me strangely, and said "That'll be three-pound-ninety-five please."

Now every time I go in there she grins at me, and once I heard her say to a fellow till girl "That's the "fucking kids" guy!" while looking at me.

I know it would've been funnier if she'd have said "Well don't fuck them then." but that isn't how it happened.
( Cawl, Wed 23 Apr 2008, 9:00, 10 replies)

think of how much worse it would've been
if you loved them
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Wed 23 Apr 2008, 9:06, closed)

I hate fucking kids too
They never want to spoon when it's over.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 23 Apr 2008, 9:08, closed)

Yeah maybe...
But still, it's one less real-life female who takes me seriously.
( Cawl, Wed 23 Apr 2008, 9:14, closed)

Ahhh....
Poor Kaola.
The best way to seduce women: shut the fuck up.
That way you don't say anything that could be misconstrued, and she thinks you're a great listener.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 23 Apr 2008, 9:20, closed)

I agree with Bert
women like a man who doesn't say anything and just hands over the cash when required.

At least, that was my experience of Ipswich.

i'm sorry, i know that was very bad
(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Apr 2008, 9:22, closed)

That was just crap
Father al, try harder.

Psst! Kaol's got a surprise for you...
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 23 Apr 2008, 9:27, closed)

I know
It came as something of a shock this morning.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 23 Apr 2008, 9:31, closed)

The best kind of
Shock, surely?
( Cawl, Wed 23 Apr 2008, 9:34, closed)

I think father al
might be a bit miffed that you've shopped an actual photo of him doing things to a goat.
I learned a long time ago that posting pictures in your profile here is asking for trouble.
Big smiles father al! :D
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 23 Apr 2008, 9:44, closed)

Yeah!
It's ok, the power of the Net Police will protect him...
( Cawl, Wed 23 Apr 2008, 10:12, closed)