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This is a question "Needless to say, I had the last laugh"

Celebrity autobiographies are filled to the brim with self-righteous tales of smug oneupmanship. So, forget you had any shame, grab a coffee and a croissant, and tell us your smug tales of when you got one over somebody.

Thanks to Ring of Fire for the suggestion

(, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 12:55)
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I knew I'd have an appropriate pearoast!
Careful who you bar.....
I was out in a town that shall be nameless as I was staying overnight because I had been invited to be on the grading panel at a martial arts club in the aforementioned town the next day.
Having been separated from my compatriots I tried to look in a noisy pub doorway to see if they were in, only to be told by a shaven headed little snot to"F$ck off grandad". I politely asked him if I could go in and see if my friends were in there only to be told "If you try and go in there pal I'll cripple ya!". Perhaps my knowing smirk may have aggravated the truncated cnut, or the fact that I was a foot taller than him and a foot wider.
He then proceeded to get the manager and take a picture of me to show the staff that I was barred! I found my friends in a bar down the road and a good night was had by all.
It came to pass that, the very next day,I was getting changed into my Gi and Hakama in the "instructors only" changing rooms set up for the occasion when I was asked to give a half-hour Aikido demonstration to the class as a warmup before the gradings proper.
I went onto the mat, was welcomed by the club's chief instructor and introduced to the members on the mat. Who should be there, wearing a YELLOW belt no less. Yep it was the stumpy, bad-tempered cnut from the night before. Chose him as my uke for the whole demonstration.
Yea, verily I did smite him. Give him his due, he didnt scream too badly when I cranked on some very painful wristlocks and his ukemi skills got a real workout for the full half-hour. He was congratulated by his fellow members for being picked as uke by the visiting instructor but his pointy ratlike face was a picture when I called him onto the mat.
I still failed him on his grading for "bad attitude".
Does that make me shallow?
(, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 11:31, 15 replies)
shallow? not at all.
you did the right thing there.
after all, you could've crippled him...
(, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 11:43, closed)
I had a karate moment which I posted about a while ago.

(, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 11:43, closed)
that makes a cunt stop and think about their behaviour is a good thing...I think he probably knew why you failed him and learnt a lesson from it.
(, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 11:47, closed)
This reminds me of that episode in The Office when Gareth's talking to the IT guy.
(, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 11:53, closed)
but gratifyingly so.
(, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 12:58, closed)
I was always taught that a huge aspect of martial arts was your attitude outside of the dojo as well,
so you did right.
(, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 13:05, closed)
Nope, sounds spot on to me
I bet the look on his face was fucking fantastic.
(, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 13:21, closed)
Seeing as
respect is a fundamental in martial arts, you did the right thing. I know for a fact my sensei would probably do the same (and would most likely not invite him back).

I certainly wouldn't want to train with someone like that.
(, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 13:33, closed)
If you look at it
as teaching him a valuable lesson in humility and control such that he may advance in the ways of Aikido it isn't even remotely shallow. Extra bonus clicks if you mentioned being a 'grandad' at some point during the demo.
(, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 14:44, closed)
Hmmmm, the 'Grandad' thing
This incident was a few years ago and I only turned 50 last year, so the 'Grandad' comment was particularly irksome.
I'd have loved to see him try that word on the late. great Tom Moss (RIP) or the late great Bill Smith (RIP).
Both were born-again hard and a comment like that would have earned the commentator a very Very hard time.
Damn I miss Aikido!
(, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 17:58, closed)
I think this is justice most deliciously served. Like other people have said, I don't think you can have a true understanding or mastery of martial arts without the respect to go with it.
(, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 19:43, closed)
that's bloody lovely. Top marks to you Capt.
(, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 20:29, closed)
These people need weeding out!
I encountered very few bullies during my career in karate, mainly because they couldn't take the discipline.

The last thing anyone needs is a shyte like this that can actually do someone some harm.
(, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 7:57, closed)
Top Tale Mon Capitan...!

However, from what you've told me about those trips and their preceding boozy do's, I'm surprised that by the next day you could still see? Let alone have any available memory.

Have a hearty click.
(, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 15:35, closed)
Poofers M'boy!
Hadn't realised the much vaunted 'Return of the prodigal Pooflake' had resulted in a top spot - which is a true masterpiece of the genre if I may say so.
As to my story, I was demonstrating Tom's famously feared 'forward/reverse Sankyo projection' as well as the Nikkyo version. Not recommended if you wish to retin the use of your wrists in the next 24 hours as I'm sure you can attest.
(, Wed 9 Feb 2011, 15:56, closed)

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