god, the universe and legal highs
you know how everyone has that one mate who non of your other friends like, the bloke you introduce to everyone and they all think he's a cock and you can't understand why. well having spent a long weekend with him at a festival i could finally see the valid points that other friends make of him "going to far"...

this is a lengthy one so by all means go to the next story if it's to long for you.

the story go's...

said friend and i (whom i shall call kev) were going to the big chill festival in 2009. kev and i studied together and yeah, back then when it came to drinking and drugs he did take it a bit to far (e.i. not knowing when to stop and making himself a mess). i was glad to hear these days were over as he claimed to be "tea-total". so with that i'm waiting for him at victoria coach station looking forward to a jolly weekend that "won't be to drug crazy", of course i was wrong.

kev eventually turned up an hour late, twitching like a loon and looking like the chemically induced bastard child of bez and super-hans from peep show. turns out according to kevs warped logic, taking legal highs still count as being "tea total". additional to this he hadn't slept the night before, just stayed up on his own getting high.

for anyone who isn't familiar with the legal highs marketed as 'bath salts', the high is pretty much exactly the same as cocaine (the after effect was different for me and kev but i'll get to that later). according to the daily mail the streets are paved with this stuff and they'll have you believe that it so evil, they're laced with peados and immigrants.

so we get a later coach, kev annoying the shit out of me as he just won't sit still and is talking complete bollocks! i'm assuming most folks here know just how annoying high people are when you're sober.

so we finally get to the festival, kev is annoying the living fuck out of me for the next two days, no matter how much i try to mingle with others, he fucks it up and make us look like loons. so what the hell i decided to join him...

like i said the effects are pretty much the same as cocaine, i had a great night and was fun. that's pretty much all i can say. i woke up feeling like shit, my mind was really else where. i pretty much stayed in the tent all day the next day and kev, fuck knows what happened to him that day. it was the 3rd day running that kev didn't have a good nights sleep (the odd hours sleep here and there) and took way more than he should of bath salts.

after another day of the festival sunday morning arrives, i'm still feeling like shit so i'm thinking it's time to go home. i look at kev's tent and notice he isn't there. i had lost him for a day and had no idea what happened to him. just then i get a call from his mobile...

"kev?"
"hello is that sweaty?"
"hi i work in the medical tent here at the festival, i have your friend 'trev' here. he's not feeling to good, can you come and collect him?"

bloody hell thinks i, although i'm packed and ready to go, i go to "collect" kev and see just what up. as i get near the medical tent i receive another phone call, this time from kev him self. turns out he "escaped" the medical tent and needed me to find him. of course it would be like finding a needle in a haystack.

for a whole weekend taking care of one person who just didn't stop with these bath salts and just wouldn't let him self sleep was really beginning to grate. i still felt like shit and i'm going home. ok in a few ways i stitched him but hey, he's an adult and shouldn't really rely on me to nurse him.

2 weeks later....

i receive a phone call from kev and find out just what happened after i left. you know how people brake into festivals, well kev broke out!
with no sleep for 4 days and to much alcohol and legal highs, kevs mind really became messed up. he was convinced that the festival was a prison camp and the stuards were prison guards out to get him. having eventually broke through a fence after shoulder barging in (and enduring heckles and cheers from a small crowd he had gathered) kev was eventually "free".

now in the middle of no where in the english countryside, kevs body and skin head was exposed to the blistering sun. kev walked for about 3 hours down some country road and got him self really badly sun burnt.

a police car eventually pulls up just to check if he is ok, kevs warped logic comes in to play so he tries to run away thinking that he will be dragged back to the 'prison camp festival'. of course he is then bundled into the police car and taken to the local station.

however this isn't the worst part of how kev ending up, in the interview room kev starts speaking the biggest load of bollocks you could speak of after 4 days without sleep, to much legal highs and to much booze.

of all things he could speak of in the interview room he speaks about... god and the universe!

with that the police felt they had no alternative but to put him in a mental hospital!

yep, the stupid bastard took it so far he ended up getting sectioned!
there he lived for the next few days, his grandad had to get him out and convince the hospital he is not nutts.

to far mate, just to far...
(sweatytramp, Mon 20 Sep 2010, 9:42, 8 replies)

I'm not angry...
...just disappointed.

I'm not even disappointed with your actions, I've been there with annoying randoms that people bring along but dear Jebus, the spelling! The atrocious spelling!

When someone has gone further than you think, or has taken more drugs than you think they should have then the word is 'too'.

Tea total?
Stuards?
Go's?
Brake? (that's a car part)
Nutts?

I'm sorry, I am a professional pedant and although I enjoyed the story it made me really clench my jaw (in a bad way).
(Ross McBingobangobongo bingobangobongo, Mon 20 Sep 2010, 12:55, closed)

Too many pills? ;-)

(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Mon 20 Sep 2010, 14:20, closed)

Shirley Tea total is correct?
"I drink only tea, hence I am tea total."

Unless one is partial to a bit of the old golf?

*Edit, I am not tea total, just so you know.
(AndyC4m Eject Eject [><], Mon 20 Sep 2010, 14:24, closed)

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teetotalism
( wotofco pissing in your swimming pool, Mon 20 Sep 2010, 15:21, closed)

Teetotal
It's in the dictionary.
(uncle_bud is not the jelly roll king., Mon 20 Sep 2010, 16:40, closed)

I felt like this
TOO
( @><|= w0nu!) or cunt to my friends, Mon 20 Sep 2010, 16:58, closed)

oops,
spelling is not my forté.
i'd edit but to be honest i really can't be bothered
(sweatytramp, Wed 22 Sep 2010, 19:44, closed)

Hehe funny *click*
I had a feeling it would end with him being sectioned....

Edit- yeah the spelling was pretty bad even by my standards, nothing an f7 won't sort out.
(bROKEN aRROW PUA HVI Master, Mon 20 Sep 2010, 14:06, closed)