I had appendicitis a few years back
and anyone else who has had it will know about the test doctors have to perform to confirm. The test involves having a finger inserted into your anus. At least my GP was kind enough not to perform it, since he said the hospital would only do it again in order to confirm anyway.

At the hospital, a young doctor comes in. He lubes up. He rams what feels like his whole hand up my asshole, then he gives me morphine.

I am not 100% sure, but I think that makes me kind of like a crack whore.

Morphine is fucking awesome though, I'll tell you that.
( Mystery_Bob, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 6:25, 2 replies)

The Gift of Morpheus..
Great stuff, isn't it?

I was on it for a week once, concurrent with 5 days of Nil By Mouth.
Coming off it isn't pleasant though...
(caescarna Hell's Roomba, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 8:04, closed)

I concur
Morphine is fucking EXCELLENT; I watched the Beckham penalty in 02 on 30 mgs of it. Party or what?

Finger up arse: "Nnnngggh!" Doc: "It wasn't good for me either"
(all my scars face forward possesses 2.5% of a hyperalloy combat chassis, Fri 12 Mar 2010, 11:40, closed)