How to avoid shaving - burn your follicles
A friend at school decided to genie a box of matches. Now, I don't know if this is general UK slang, but what this means is to take a match out of the box, strike it, then put it back into the box, thereby lighting every match in there.

Burny flaming fun, but don't try to blow it out.

As you can probably guess, my mate attempted to blow the flames out. That backfired BADLY and he ended up badly burning his chin and mouth area. No permanent scars, but it was a mess for a while.


Now wait a few years... and as he headed into later teens he noticed he had a big advantage over other male friends. He didn't need to shave! That rather nasty accident as a younger teen had remove all the hair from his face. He only needs to shave every couple of weeks.

Not sure if I can recommend setting light to your face to save on the cost of razors... but it worked for Andy.


(I am starting to worry how many pyro-based stories this QOTW has dragged out from my mind...)
( Batter Pudding Hurler is a figment of your imagination, Wed 28 Jan 2015, 21:01, 7 replies)

all his face?
seems odd that chin burns would stop his beard growing through his cheeks
(Carpe Cyprinidae, Wed 28 Jan 2015, 21:27, closed)

that's cos it didn't happen you fucking plum

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 28 Jan 2015, 21:59, closed)

It did! I done the same with me bollocks.

( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Thu 29 Jan 2015, 9:29, closed)

It happened...
This did really happen, but I wasn't actually there when he burnt himself. He certainly avoided shaving for far too long as an after effect of it. Almost funny how little hair growth he would get on his face even well into his late 20s.

Or maybe he was just a girl and hiding it well.

I can't say why he didn't get any on his cheeks. Not everyone grows beard in the same way. Mine clings more to my jaw bone. Sideburns stay narrow, and joins into a bushy beard, but not much onto the cheeks.

We are all different.


It would be interesting to catch up with this guy now 30 years later and see if he still only shaves one a fortnight.
( Batter Pudding Hurler is a figment of your imagination, Thu 29 Jan 2015, 15:00, closed)

Maybe it was something in the water...
There must have been something odd about the area I grew up in. Maybe we all just were obsessed with fire to different levels. I know at least three people who had various levels of facial injuries. These two I've mentioned in QOTW were both lucky to avoid permanent scars.

Another guy from our village was a lot less lucky after getting a firework in the face. That permanently fucked up his face, but taught the rest of us the old rule of never returning to a lit firework.

Then we have the guy who set light to the hay barn needing fifteen fire engines to put it out...

Another guy at School who didn't like being suspended, so came back one night and threw a petrol bomb into the staff room.

And this is all in sleepy Oxfordshire! Boredom of the countryside I guess
( Batter Pudding Hurler is a figment of your imagination, Thu 29 Jan 2015, 15:27, closed)

If Carpe Cypridnae didn't have me on 2.0 I'd have been able to tell him how this works.
As it is, he does, so I can't.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Thu 29 Jan 2015, 10:25, closed)

Also: Carpe Cypridnae fingers dogs' bums.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Thu 29 Jan 2015, 10:25, closed)