when i was 15 i used to smoke spliffs out the skylight with my mate
we used to have to take it in turns to lean right out to stop the horrid stench of the plastic ridden soapbar getting us into shit. puffing away one day i dropped the spliff. as the badly built bifter rapidly rolled down the roof of the three storey building i lunged instinctively. i slid on to the roof and as my knees passed lip of the skylight i started to think oh fuck. my mate grabbed my lower legs and hauled me back up. if he'd not been there or if he'd not reacted i reckon i'd have been all mashed up at best or dead. nice one.
( tickle I was away, Fri 10 May 2013, 0:33, 5 replies)

At your inquest they'd have said you'd tried to fly out of the window
being a crazed drug-fiend.
(Juan Quar is clinging to her front teeth on, Fri 10 May 2013, 5:35, closed)

If he'd have let you go,
We wouldn't have to put up with this shit excuse for a story.
(Vigilante Man weeps because you're stupid., Fri 10 May 2013, 8:43, closed)

if you had a penis you could cut it off, freeze it and go fuck yourself.

( tickle I was away, Fri 10 May 2013, 23:49, closed)

Walking home after a few spliffs and a few pints, my mate once turned to me and said
"Do you realise that if you tripped on the pavement now and fell in front of a car, your death would be described in the media as being the result of your being "On a heady cocktail of drink and drugs"?"
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 10 May 2013, 10:19, closed)

That's true
A teenage suicide victim was described by our local rag as having 'drugs' in her pockets. Her parents objected strongly as the 'drugs' were actually ibuprofen or something: nothing to do with her death and certainly not illegal.

Their reply was more or less 'She's dead, we can say that we like about her.'
(Juan Quar is clinging to her front teeth on, Fri 10 May 2013, 12:07, closed)