I lost my gorgeous wife to cancer just over two years ago
Normally i would have been one of the first to belittle people with depression and give them a curt " snap out of it you soft twat". However exactly one day after her funeral i entered a very dark place that was totally out of my control. Fuck me was it horrible. For two months i fought with it, feeling like i would never break its grip. Everytime i looked back on memories etc, they all seemed completely pointless . The world was a tiny worthless heap that i happened to be in.
All the time i was putting on the "i'm ok" face for family and my then six year old son. Friends would say things like " i dont know how you cope, i wouldn't be able to"
Truth was i couldn't but what fucking choice did i have.
Eventually i came through by grasping at five minute windows of "normality" and moved on from there.
Those of you who still battle this demon, my heart goes out to you. You will make it.
I never , ever want to experience anything like it again.
(boarders You won't catch me with my trousers, Tue 4 May 2010, 22:10, Reply)