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This is a question My Arch-nemesis

I lived in fear of a Darth Vader-esque school dinner lady who stood me perpetually at the naughty table for refusing to eat mushy peas. An ordeal made worse after I was caught spooning the accursed veg into her wellies. Who, we ask, has wrecked your life?

Thanks to Philly G for the suggestion

(, Thu 29 Apr 2010, 12:01)
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that is the case. But I'll respond by saying that it's a hell of a lot more difficult to be "strong" for someone when they're treating you in the manner described above. I obviously am not absolving myself of all blame, but honestly, all I can remember is being confused and scared by how she behaved with no provocation. It would be a different story if I'd been a cunt and hit her or mentally tortured her. But I did not, nor did I ever want to (during the relationship).

Are you just suggesting that I "enabled" her to do these things because I wasn't strong due to the fact I was young and naive? If I could be anything but naive during that time, trust me, I would have been. If my naivety contributed to her attitude, then surely she should have told me? When I tried to be strong and leave, then she reacted terribly. I don't know.
(, Wed 5 May 2010, 16:56, 1 reply)
I wasn't going to say anything...
But I got out of something very similar a while ago, and I'm wayyy older than you were, very much old enough to know better. But I didn't, so I don't think you should be hard on yourself, because inexperience is not always good protection from people like that.
And that's why I'm not Sparky anymore...
(, Wed 5 May 2010, 20:10, closed)
like I mentioned
above, it was also the fact that she was manipulative and controlling, giving me threats if I did leave her, threats to kill herself etc. I guess that stuff is horrible no matter what age you are.

Glad you got out of the similar relationship. I firmly believe that my time with her was very damaging in many ways indeed.
(, Thu 6 May 2010, 9:48, closed)
Sorry, I cant rememeber which way round these letters go. Maybe someone can help in rearranging. MUTF
(, Thu 6 May 2010, 13:12, closed)
for your input. "MTFU" perhaps? Very enlightening. I didn't realise it was wrong and "not manly" of me to feel hurt and confused by blatantly irrational abusive behaviour. I didn't post this looking for advice, it's just a story of a few years of my life. I still can't quite get at what your original reply was suggesting. Obviously if I were stronger at that time then things would have been different, but I wasn't. So, whatever.
(, Thu 6 May 2010, 13:21, closed)

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