I'll never forget this.
Two years ago, in the run up to christmas, I was going through a pretty bad time of my life. My wife had left me two years earlier for another man and had just had a child with him, and although I pretended to myself everything was OK, I was completely broken up inside. I occupied my time going out and enjoying myself with my friends, but when I was alone I sometimes just wished I could go to sleep and never wake up. I'd been to the doctors and was going through a little stage of trying anti-depressants but they weren't helping, at the time I didn't think I was too bad but looking back now I realise just how low I was. For the most part, I kept it all to myself and didn't tell another soul how I felt, put a happy face on and tried to be normal. I'm quite a private person and don't share things easily.

I had moved back in with my parents after the split, and had pretty much wallowed there ever since. One evening, as I sat in my room watching telly, my mum stuck her head round the door and asked if I was ok, and for some reason, the usual "aye, fine" just didn't come out. She came in and sat down on the bed and asked what was wrong and I started making up the usual excuses that I just wasn't feeling too well, but then I just blurted out the words "I miss her, mum."

My mum had hated my ex and wished I had never married her. "I know I shouldn't after everything she's done, but I just miss her." She didn't say anything, she just gave me a hug and I completely broke down. I sat there crying like a baby and just let everything I had held in for two long years flow out.

It was around that time that my mum fell ill, and a couple of months later she was taken into hospital and diagnosed with cancer of the stomach. It had already spread and within a month she was gone. I never got to tell her how much that hug meant to me and how it helped me through one of the darkest times of my life. I'll never forget it.
( baw__bag contains traces of nuts on, Thu 2 Oct 2008, 17:45, 12 replies)

I
feel for you mate, thanks for sharing
(Balron doesn't care how big his photos are, Thu 2 Oct 2008, 17:50, closed)

Mums are pretty cool people
I guarantee you that she knows how grateful you are.
She'll never forget it, either.
(w4I4q1O1 was hard at work on, Thu 2 Oct 2008, 17:55, closed)

Speaking as someone who's mum is not long of this world for similar reasons,
you have got me choked up good and proper :(
Hope you're ok.
( Victor Meldrew, Thu 2 Oct 2008, 17:57, closed)

*hugs*
she was your mum, she knew.
(TheWeeWitch hasn't been here much recently .., Thu 2 Oct 2008, 18:07, closed)

exactly correct
*something in eye*
( Fathter Puddytat Kill Kill dat widdle boid is mine on, Wed 8 Oct 2008, 16:49, closed)

:')
Everyone else has already said it, I just wanted to join in the bittersweet group-hug.
(idle insomniac enjoys listening to Sigur Rós at stupid hours, Fri 3 Oct 2008, 4:33, closed)

*sniff*
Mums are ace.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 3 Oct 2008, 7:22, closed)

.
*cries*
( e.m.m.y. foxtrot uniform charlie kilo india tango, Fri 3 Oct 2008, 9:52, closed)

I lost my mum just 5 weeks and 1 day ago
Trying hard not to start bubbling at my desk.

Big clicks.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 3 Oct 2008, 10:18, closed)

Aw thanks all :)
Things are going much better now and I know she's looking down and keeping an eye on me :)

Hope everyone else is OK too, I know how hard it can be :(
( baw__bag contains traces of nuts on, Fri 3 Oct 2008, 17:32, closed)

Yup, mums know.
They do, y'know.
(Juan Quar is clinging to her front teeth on, Sat 4 Oct 2008, 9:48, closed)

Thank you for this story; it made me cry.
I lost my mum very recently too and I sometimes feel sad about all the things I'd like to have told her and can't.

But you know, your mum feeling you let go in her arms like that probably told her exactly how much you needed that hug.

I hope you're doing better now.
( thealternativefact, Sat 4 Oct 2008, 19:37, closed)