worst. hangover. ever.
during what i now refer to as my idiotic pisshead phase, i went to the pub with a couple of girlfriends. we'd already been drinking in the house, so we were pretty squiffy by the time we got to our local.
a couple of local lads took a shine to us and more drinks were forthcoming.
by 9p.m, the bar staff were refusing to serve us any more, so we decided to go back to the house of one of the lads for more drinks.
on the way, one of my mates and her drunken swain buggered off down an alleyway, instructing us not to wait for them. my other mate and her new beau also decided that they wanted some alone time, which left just me and the bloke whose house we were headed for.
upon arriving at his house, bob(for that is his name) poured me a glass of whisky. "sorry, i've got no mixers", he tells me. not to worry, i was quite pissed enough to drink it straight.
the remainder of the night passed in a haze of whisky, impromptu guitar music and naked piano playing(him, not me).
around 5 a.m, my feet were getting rather itchy and my host was out for the count. letting myself out, i headed to my mate's place.
she was not pleased to see me. i was horrendously drunk and had interrupted her little game of bedroom leapfrog. she decided the best thing to do was sober me up.
yeah, fat chance.
she fed me noodles, which ended up all over the carpet. i put the bowl on the floor, only to be yelled at to pick it up. unfortunately, as i was pissed, every time i tried to pick the bowl up, i'd kick it. i spent a good ten minutes chasing that fucking bowl across the carpet. the food didn't help, as i'd sneaked some whisky out of bob's house and was now sitting on my mate's bed, drinking merriy away.
my mate had had enough and told me to leave. i staggered out and headed home.
halfway across the road, it was like someone had dropped a blackout curtain down in front of me. i have no memory of falling in the gutter, having a shopkeeper trying to force-feed me coffee, or even of my father being called to get me and kicking me up the arse, before leaving me there, disgusted.
my next memory was of lying face-down on a hospital bed, whilst my clothes were being cut off me and a tube forced down my throat. turns out the "whisky" i'd been drinking was pure hooch, unbelievably strong and almost lethal. i spent the next day in hospital, feeling like a world-class tool and vomiting charcoal. i even hallucinated an old woman in the dayroom, thanks to having the d.t's. unpleasant doesn't quite cover it.

for 2 years afterwards, not a drop of alcohol passed my lips and, even now, the smell of whisky makes me retch.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 24 Mar 2011, 18:08, 10 replies)

Oooof!
Nasty. But has the lack of alcohol brought on a refusal to use capital letters?
( @><|= w0nu!) or cunt to my friends, Thu 24 Mar 2011, 22:33, closed)

i've never used capital letters
and i'm completely unrepentant ;)
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 24 Mar 2011, 23:11, closed)

;0 i like your style1
And am aghast I've not noticed it before!

_{Well perhaps mildly surprised at least}
( @><|= w0nu!) or cunt to my friends, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 21:45, closed)

:)

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 26 Mar 2011, 15:55, closed)

"like someone had dropped a blackout curtain down in front of me"
Thank you! I've been searching for a good phrase to describe the complete lack of any memory I have of a certain night for years.

The night in question ended (apparently) with two doors (one an external access door) having to be kicked down to rescue me from behind a bathroom door where I was lying having knocked myself out on the bathroom sink. The only recollection I have leading up to this event is leaving a friends house late in the evening. I then woke up to the carnage I'd caused late the next morning. It was about 13 years ago and I haven't once had any recollection of what transpired in the 'blank period'.
( Evil Bastardo, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 11:23, closed)

it's a bit scary, really
but you can't be very ashamed of things you don't remember, fortunately
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 11:27, closed)

Hear Hear..
If you can't remember it, it did'nt happen.

That's what I believe anyway, that is, until the Police arrive..
(danniekavanagh did nothing constructive on, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 14:35, closed)

it's stood me in good stead through many a night on the tiles

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 25 Mar 2011, 21:40, closed)

What is it about whisky?
I've been seriously shitfaced on pretty much every spirit going at some point in my life but, like Smash, even the smell of whisky makes me gag.
( His Popiness the Hole Invaded Poland on, Sun 27 Mar 2011, 22:08, closed)

it's distilled evil

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 28 Mar 2011, 0:24, closed)