Time to revive the b3ta Tall Cowards' Club, I think...
b3ta.com/questions/fakingit/post200444
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Sat 26 Mar 2011, 9:50, 2 replies)

Sign me up
6'2, about 85kgs and reasonably well built, but soft as melted shite. The worst thing is having glasses. If I've got my contacts in and I'm backed into a corner, I suppose that I'd have a go, but with my glasses on? No way. I'd fold faster than Superman on laundry day. I can't see shit without them. Thing is, I know that first punch they'd fly off and then I'd be scrabbling round on the floor, telling people not to move so that they don't stand on them. Hardly a way to strike fear into the hearts' of pikeys.

Doesn't stop me from having a REALLY stupid habit though. Whenever I see fights in bars and clubs, I always try and break them up. I've no idea why. Never been punched cos of it, but very nearly been thrown out and just last week I got bled on profusely. I don't know these people, I just think that if, as soon as a fight started, everyone in the club pulled the pugilists apart and calmed them down then the world would be a better place.

Never mind

*Edit* Just scrolled the rest of the way down that thread and found the badge. What must one do to become an official member? Attempt to bully a child then run away screaming when they slap you round the ankles?
( kappynitty doubled your entendre on, Sat 26 Mar 2011, 10:47, closed)

Naaah.
Just click it to get to b3tards, then copy the URL into your profile.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Sat 26 Mar 2011, 12:44, closed)

oh. ok then. so I'm not allowed within 500m of any local primary schools for no reason then.
other than, y'know, the paedoing.
( kappynitty doubled your entendre on, Sat 26 Mar 2011, 14:37, closed)

Glasses - check. Scrabbling - check.
Had that happen once. My glasses were punched off and I bent over to search for them on the floor. Just as I did this the gatecrashing ned took a swipe at me with a knife, leaving me with a nice slash across the back of my neck. That was the last house party I ever threw.
( SteamedCleaner, Sun 27 Mar 2011, 3:54, closed)

house party I ever threw time I had mum round for dinner.

sorry, couldn't resist
( Wet-chinned bag shanker Cannot parse Wogan, Mon 28 Mar 2011, 15:32, closed)

I am now a member!
*nervous high fives*
( Wet-chinned bag shanker Cannot parse Wogan, Sun 27 Mar 2011, 11:05, closed)