Not having sex
Our pal Freddie Woo says: Climbing into the back seat of the car, she sat on a fortnight-old bag of food shopping I had completely forgotten about. The stench of a bag of bean sprouts popping open is a real passion-killer, I can tell you for nothing. Tell us about the shag you didn't have because you blew it.
( , Thu 22 May 2014, 14:01)
Our pal Freddie Woo says: Climbing into the back seat of the car, she sat on a fortnight-old bag of food shopping I had completely forgotten about. The stench of a bag of bean sprouts popping open is a real passion-killer, I can tell you for nothing. Tell us about the shag you didn't have because you blew it.
( , Thu 22 May 2014, 14:01)
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straight out of a porn flick
Every time I visited the pizza place, I'd joke with the delivery boys, both of whom were 'jock' types and wouldn't have looked out of place in a Calvin Klein advert. I never for the life of me imagined that I had a chance, or that they were anything other than straight. Then, one evening, I ordered a delivery and the cute blond winked at me and said, "If you give me a bigger tip, I could slip you some meat with the next one..."
"No thanks, I'm vegetarian," I said, and closed my door.
Five minutes later I was groaning and I still wince about it ten years later. He was gorgeous. I never saw him again. His Uncle, who owns the place, will only say that he "fell in with a bad crowd".
( , Sat 24 May 2014, 12:59, 4 replies)
Every time I visited the pizza place, I'd joke with the delivery boys, both of whom were 'jock' types and wouldn't have looked out of place in a Calvin Klein advert. I never for the life of me imagined that I had a chance, or that they were anything other than straight. Then, one evening, I ordered a delivery and the cute blond winked at me and said, "If you give me a bigger tip, I could slip you some meat with the next one..."
"No thanks, I'm vegetarian," I said, and closed my door.
Five minutes later I was groaning and I still wince about it ten years later. He was gorgeous. I never saw him again. His Uncle, who owns the place, will only say that he "fell in with a bad crowd".
( , Sat 24 May 2014, 12:59, 4 replies)
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